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His voice was gruff, but I could hear the tears it muffled. He rubbed his hands across his eyes. “You’ve got it, Menolly. I’ll do you proud. But it’s not going to come to that. You’re going to age gracefully, like Roman has. You’re going to keep control of your nature.”
“I hope so. But today scared me. I made an oath to myself that I won’t feed on friends. Roman—yes, because he’s a vampire and we can take it to the extreme. But not my other friends. Not my family, or my love. I never want to break that oath again.”
Roz slipped his arm around my waist and for once, I allowed the touch. Nerissa was usually the only one who could get away with it. I just didn’t like to be touched, especially by breathers. The hunger flared in the oddest moments and I didn’t even want to give it a chance to tempt me.
But now, I rested my head on his shoulder. Roz understood what it was like to have your life totally disrupted and turned inside out. All of us did, but he more than most of them.
By the time we reached the house, I was twenty minutes away from needing to be downstairs. Iris must have heard what had happened because she drew me aside. “Do you need anything before you sleep?”
I shook my head. I was full, thanks to Roz. “No. I assume you heard what happened?”
She nodded. “Yeah, Camille warned me on her way through to grab some supplies to replenish the wards. Menolly, it sounds like you were under a spell.”
“Yeah, but now I’m scared because that thing took the shape of Nerissa, and if I didn’t know she was safely off at a conference in Bellingham, I’d be tearing over to her place to make sure she was okay.”
“It probably was able to play on your weaknesses—you saw the person you trust the most.” Iris smiled. “However, I called her to make sure when Camille told me what happened. Woke her up, but she’s fine. You can rest easy on that.”
A wave of relief swept over me. “Thank you…you always look out for me, Iris. I don’t know how you find the energy.”
“It’s just what I do. Now you should get into your lair and sleep.” She yawned.
“Yeah…listen, tell the others to do whatever research they can today. When I wake up, we’ll figure out what to do about finding Gulakah. I’m certain he’s over here now.”
“You’re probably right. But go—it’s nearing dawn and you must be tired.”
I was. The rise of the sun didn’t just mean danger for vampires; it also meant that we were pulled into a dizzying sleep, one from which we could not awaken until dusk. The rise of the sun sent us into a deep somnambulance, and even a nuclear attack would not wake us. Mortals were safe from us during the daylight hours—there was no way we could attack them. Although ancient vampires like Roman could sometimes resist the pull for up to a half hour or so, even they were slaves to the light.
I raised her hand and kissed it. “Thank you, little mama. How’s your morning sickness?”
Iris’s morning sickness had struck her 24/7. She rolled her eyes. “Oh, simply lovely. I wanted to live in the bathroom. But it should ease off after the first three months. Or at least I keep telling myself that. Oh—before you go, I might as well tell you. I’ll tell the others after they’ve had a rest. Bruce and I are renting a trailer and putting it out back. It should be here today. We’ll live there until our house is built. I love this house, but there are just too many people living here now for comfort, and Hanna deserves her own room.”
I wanted to argue, but I knew she was right—the house was getting too crowded. And she and Bruce would be just steps away.
“That’s probably best. But we’ll miss having you in here, and you’d damned well better let Camille and Morio set up wards. With his help, her magic shouldn’t backfire. And now, I have to sleep.”
My eyes were beginning to close and I was finding it hard to ignore the magnetic pull of the sun. Part of me longed to peek out the window, to watch dawn break. I could, but I’d be cutting it close and there was just too much at stake to make a mistake.
I opened the bookcase in the kitchen and unlocked the steel door behind it. After locking it behind me, I descended the steps to my bedroom and stripped, dumping my dirt- and bloodstained jeans and turtleneck into the laundry basket, which sat just inside what passed for a bathroom.
Well, it was a bathroom, but I never needed to use the toilet. We’d installed it in case the others needed to use my lair for a panic room. But the shower—a wide walk-in affair—was perfect to stand in, hosing down after feeding or fighting. And even though I didn’t notice the hot or cold unless I chose to, I did enjoy feeling clean, and I liked standing under the spray of water.
I let the water wash over me as I lathered up with a raspberry-scented body wash. As I rinsed and toweled off, I thought about Roz and what had happened. There had to be some way to ensure that this remained the only time. I had to find something to keep me from ever being susceptible to charm again. Because I could not live with myself if I killed one of my friends—or one of my sisters.
With these thoughts on my mind, I slid under the green toile cover and turned out the light, and let the sunrise sing me to sleep as I hid in the dark.
Chapter 6
I found myself walking in a fog. Everywhere I looked, a mist rose around me and the world seemed hazy, all shades of gray. And then, as I adjusted to my surroundings, I began to run.
Long ago, Camille had asked me if vampires dreamed. I told her yes. We walked the Dream-Time in our sleep, locked away from the waking world, caught in our own private universe. We could never go out of body, but we could wander on the ether in a somnambulant daze. Sometimes we walked the past, reliving the days from our lives, and sometimes we walked the present.
But I had always welcomed the nights when I slipped into obscurity, when my mind shut down and left me to rest in the blessed darkness. It was a relief, to be free from the constant edge of hunger that lurked within me. For all vampires were predators, and we were all capable of turning into wild beasts, the monsters of legend and lore.
But tonight, I wanted to talk to Roman, and so I called out for him as I ran, searching for him on the Dream-Time.
A faint bluesy tune reached my ears, and I blinked. Roman was near, all right. He always made an entrance—one impossible to ignore. The music—I recognized it as the Gorillaz’ “Every Planet We Reach Is Dead”—swelled and I felt a rush of anticipation. Though I didn’t like to admit it, there were times I simply needed to be around other vampires who understood what it meant to be a bloodsucker.
And then, the mist parted, and I was standing in his parlor. Well, not really, but I might as well be. My mind had reached out and touched his. My spirit couldn’t leave my body, though I could travel physically to the astral. But my thoughts could project outward. It was a complicated matter, and I wasn’t even sure that I fully understood my own nature.
