Page 85 of Point of Contact

“I had him for twenty years, Jess, and I’ll have to be without him for maybe twice that. I met this woman at Arlington whose son died in Vietnam. For forty years she’d been coming to his grave.” Trevor slumped, and Jesse slid his arm around his shoulders, pulling him close. “I barely got through one year. How am I supposed to get through forty?”

A shudder ran through him. Jesse searched desperately for something to say, but then Trevor stood up straight. “I’ll figure it out, because I owe him that. Moving forward with my life, and really living it, is the best way I know to honor his.”

Trevor put his hand in his pocket, withdrawing something that gave a clink. When he opened his palm, Jesse caught his breath. Riley’s dog tags. They glittered in the moonlight, and Jesse reached out to touch them with a trembling finger, memories assaulting him from all sides.

“Oh, Riles,” he whispered, his eyes burning.

“I said once that I’d ask you what happened to him when the time was right, but I’ve decided I don’t want to know. Riley was at war, and he died. The truth is it played out the way it played out, and now I have to live with it.” Trevor closed his fingers around the dog tags, pressing his fist to his mouth, sudden tears streaking his cheeks. “Just tell me that he wasn’t alone, Jess. Tell me that he didn’t die alone.”

“He wasn’t alone,” Jesse said firmly, and Trevor looked up at him, his gray eyes liquid with emotion. “I held his hand, and I told him if he needed to go, he should go. I told him you loved him and that you would be okay.” His voice broke on the last word, and Trevor made a small sound, moving closer to him.

“That night on the mountain I had to let go of the might-have-beens. Now I have to accept the things that can’t be changed, and do my best to make him proud of me.” Trevor kissed the dog tags, then drew his arm back and flung them with all his strength into the crashing surf, a glint of metal arcing briefly before disappearing forever.

“I love you, Riley James,” Trevor said, his voice faint but rock steady, and he leaned against Jesse, his body heavy and warm.

Jesse tightened his arm around him. “He’s already proud of you, Trev.”

* * *

They wandered back toward their cabin, hands stuffed in their pockets, shoulders touching. When they reached the wine bottle still stuck in the sand, Jesse leaned to pick it up.

“How about we finish this off?”

In answer Trevor sank to sitting, and he held out his glass. “Fill ’er up.”

They drank wine under the stars, and after a while Trevor grew drowsy. It seemed like too much effort to head for the cabin, so he curled up on his side in the cool sand, cheek pillowed on his hands. He drifted in and out, listening to the sound of the shushing waves, every now and then giving a little shiver as the sea breeze wafted over his skin.

When he woke from his next doze, he was deliciously, comfortably warm, because Jesse was spooned around him, his chest moving rhythmically against Trevor’s back as he slept. One of Jesse’s arms was crooked up under his head, and his other arm was draped loosely around Trevor’s waist.

Feeling safe and utterly relaxed, Trevor snuggled closer and went back to sleep.

The sky was a little lighter when he woke again, Jesse’s solid warmth still pressed up behind him. He gave a stretch, wincing as his muscles protested the hard ground they’d been subjected to.

“Hey.” Jesse’s voice was a husky rasp in Trevor’s ear, and the sound of it scratched along Trevor’s skin and thickened his cock. He shifted restlessly.

“Hey,” Trevor managed, aware of how hoarse he sounded, too. “How’d you sleep?”

“Here and there.”

“You could’ve woken me, made me go inside.”

“Nah. This was fine. More than fine. No!” Jesse tightened his arm around his waist when Trevor tried to move away. “I mean, uh, will you stay and watch the sunrise with me?”

Trevor bit his lip at how his body was reacting to Jesse’s proximity, and he gave a pleasurable shiver, settling back against him again with a sigh. Above them the sky lightened even more and took on a pink glow.

“God, that’s gorgeous,” Trevor murmured in awe. “I’ve never seen anything like it.”

“Yeah. Beautiful.” Jesse swallowed hard, his voice sounding strange, so Trevor canted his head back to look at him.

What he saw in his eyes made Trevor catch his breath. There was shyness there, uncertainty, but it was tinged with an unmistakable heat that made every one of Trevor’s nerve endings blaze to life.

“Jess?” Trevor reached up to brush his fingers along Jesse’s cheek, tenderness surging when Jesse trembled against him.

Yes.

Trevor closed his eyes as Jesse’s warm lips covered his, this first kiss gentle, tentative, and almost unbearably sweet. It was over all too soon, and Trevor couldn’t help the needy little sound that escaped him when Jesse pulled back.

With an answering groan, Jesse lowered his head again, and this time his kiss wasn’t gentle. Before he knew it, Trevor was flat on his back, arms wrapped around Jesse’s neck, his world narrowed down to the scorching heat of Jesse’s mouth, the silky demands of his tongue.