Page 64 of Keeping a Warrior

Shane had turned away by now, his head once again bent attentively toward his date. Matt’s body went rigid at the sight, but he called out “One more” to the DJ before trotting over to confer with him briefly.

“This song reminds me of the best night of my life,” he said into the microphone before launching into it, a plaintive Keith Urban song about falling in love in the back of a cop car.

Devon stood off to the side as Matt’s voice soared over the crowd, watching Shane’s face. It started out blank, impassive, but as the words and their meaning washed over him, it gradually softened until the two of them were staring at each other like they were the only two people in the place.

“I was there the night Shane almost got arrested,” Rhys said softly from behind her. “Matt wasn’t going to let him go to jail alone, so he organized quite the resistance.”

Devon smiled, and before she knew it, she was leaning back against Rhys’s broad chest as his hands settled on her hips.

“I just want them to make it,” she said, tilting her head back so her lips brushed against Rhys’s cheek. “I know it’s going to take more than a song, but I’m keeping my fingers crossed it at least gets them to talk.”

Rhys slid his arms all the way around her waist and settled his chin on the top of her head as they listened. Not far away, Sarah was watching them, her hand over her mouth, tears in her eyes.

It felt so good to be held, to have a handsome man’s admiration and attention focused completely on her. A man she admired in return, one she liked more than she wanted to admit. Where would they go from here? Devon didn’t know, but she was more than willing to ride the wave and let things unfold.

When the song ended, Matt leapt lightly from the stage with a bashful smile toward his adoring fans. He disappeared outside, and after a beat of hesitation, Shane murmured something into his date’s ear and followed him.

“I need to keep an eye on them,” Devon said to Rhys, reluctantly pulling away from him, goosebumps springing up everywhere as his hands trailed along her sides and hips before he let her go.

“Hurry back,” he whispered.

Outside, Matt paced back and forth while Shane leaned against the wall not far from him, arms crossed over his chest.

“I can’t believe you brought a date,” Matt was saying. “You brought a fucking date to a party you knew I’d be at!”

“So?” Shane gave an indifferent shrug. “This is me ‘getting on with my life,’ Matt. The very thing you yelled at me to do that night.”

“But—”

“But what? You can’t have it both ways, babe.” Shane’s voice was hard. “I told you I supported you one hundred percent, even if it’s my choice not to renew my SEAL contract.”

Matt stopped in front of him. “I’m sorry for every stupid thing I said that night. You said you wanted to get out, and I got scared—”

“That getting out would mean I expected you to as well?” Instead of softening, Shane’s tone grew even more brusque. “That’s stupid, Matt. When I fell in love with you, I fell in love with every part of you, even the SEAL part. Even the part that wants to apply to DEVGRU. Asking you to give that up would be asking you to cut out a huge piece of yourself, and I would never ever do that to you.”

“I know—” Matt put his hand on Shane’s arm, but Shane roughly shook it off.

“No, you don’t know. You didn’t trust me, plain and simple.”

“I panicked, okay? With you in medical school and me off at Green Team, and then deploying God knows where at a moment’s notice, we’d hardly ever be together.”

“And that’s a life I said I’d gladly take on. I haven’t once, in all the time I’ve known you, demanded any guarantees from you. All I ever wanted was one day at a time, Matt, but for some reason that’s not good enough for you.” He shrugged. “What that tells me is that this whole time you’ve been looking for a way out.”

“I’m not,” Matt said desperately. “I swear I’m not.”

“You tell me to move on,” Shane said implacably, “but then you show up here in my goddamn task unit. You want to smash my date’s face in. What’d you think, that when you’re done being a SEAL, I’ll just be waiting around to let you come waltzing back into my life?”

“Shane—”

“Let me tell you something. I’m not going to pine away for you. I want to have sex. I want to find love, have a relationship, maybe even a family someday.” Shane’s voice finally broke. “I wanted all that with you, but if that’s not gonna happen, I will move on.”

As he pushed off the wall and turned to leave, Matt gave him a huge shove, sending him staggering. “So I’m that replaceable, then?” he snarled, his cheeks red with anger and pain.

“Replaceable?” Shane threw his head back and laughed bitterly. “There will never be another you, Matt. Never.” He smoothed down the front of his shirt. “And now, because I’m a gentleman, I’m going to finish my date and then drive him home.”

“You’d better not kiss him good-night. You hear me, Shane?”

Shane paused midstep. “And why shouldn’t I?” He seemed to be holding his breath.