Page 23 of Everything Changes

CAREY WOKE up slowly, disoriented for a moment. He knew he was at Jase’s house, but where was… oh, right. After Jase’s combat stress flashback and ensuing anxiety attack and the emotional storm that followed, Carey hadn’t felt right leaving Jase alone, but both of them needed sleep desperately. Carey had lifted Jase’s chin so he could look into his eyes and said, “Hey, squid, let’s dog pile, yeah?”

When they were back in Afghanistan, some nights when the threat level was high for incoming RPGs, the unit would dig foxholes for safety and sleep in them. Even in the desert, the nights could get brutally cold, and the only way to get a decent night’s sleep was to try to share body heat. Two, sometimes even three Marines would huddle together in a foxhole, pretty much spooning to try to keep warm enough to sleep. Jase and Carey had done it several times, and not only had they kept each other warm, they silently drew comfort from the human contact.

The night before, Carey’s suggestion to dog pile was met with a weak smile and a nod, and Jase had stood up wearily and pulled Carey upright, helping him lean against the wall. He had picked up Carey’s prosthetic and tucked it under his arm, bringing his other arm around Carey’s waist as they made their way slowly to Jase’s bedroom.

After getting situated, using the bathroom and getting teeth brushed, they’d lain down fully clothed on top of the covers on Jase’s bed, and Carey had pulled Jase into his arms, his back to Carey’s front, spooning. After a little bit of wrestling around to get comfortable, Carey sticking a pillow between his knees to cushion his stump, they drifted off into an exhausted sleep.

Now Carey realized sometime during the night Jase had rolled to his back, and Carey found himself half-sprawled on Jase’s chest, his head tucked under Jase’s chin. Carey’s T-shirt had rucked up while they slept, and Jase’s hand was resting in the small of Carey’s back, directly on his naked skin. Carey was warm and comfortable, and he had no desire to move. For some reason this felt right, and he was tired of fighting it. He cared about Jase deeply… and he couldn’t deny it anymore. A sexual attraction had grown from that and had been present for a long time.

After a few minutes, he couldn’t help himself, and he raised his head carefully, lifting his eyes to Jase’s face, and he felt a rush of emotion go through him when he saw how peaceful he looked in sleep. Jase’s lips were slightly parted, and his long lashes brushed his cheeks. Carey never wanted to see again the pinched, haunted look he’d seen on Jase’s face last night, and he felt sorrow and regret well up at the thought of how he’d never bothered to simply thank Jase for saving his damn life.

Some hair had fallen over Jase’s forehead, and Carey reached up and brushed it away, murmuring, “Jase.”

Jase came awake slowly, his eyes dazed with sleep and confusion, and then they sharpened as memory returned. His hand tightened on Carey’s back, pulling him closer, his fingers brushing back and forth over the warm skin.

“Hey,” he whispered, searching Carey’s eyes with his own. Carey smiled at him, letting what he was feeling soften his gaze. Jase caught his breath, his expression turning questioning. Carey pushed up on one elbow and leaned in, letting his lips feather across Jase’s.

“Morning,” he whispered back, kissing Jase again, a little more firmly this time, parting his lips slightly and letting Jase feel the dampness, the moisture.

Jase grazed his fingers farther up Carey’s back under his shirt, almost tentatively, as if expecting to be rebuffed, as his mouth yielded under Carey’s. Carey arched against him slightly, a soft hum in the back of his throat.

Jase groaned, bringing his free hand up to cup the back of Carey’s head as he allowed Carey to deepen the kiss further. They parted their lips and pressed them back together over and over, their breathing growing rough as desire ratcheted up. Carey was achingly hard, and he pressed his cock against Jase’s thigh, letting him feel it.

Jase broke the kiss and cupped Carey’s cheeks with his hands. “Carey, what….”

“I want you, Jase,” Carey said simply. “I’m tired of fighting it, and so I’m not going to anymore.”

The confusion in Jase’s eyes was fucking adorable, and Carey leaned down to kiss him again just as Jase said, “Fighting it?”

The words ended up muffled against Carey’s mouth, and they kissed passionately. It had turned from tentative to deep and wet and hot. Carey was awash in desire, and when Jase suddenly flipped him to his back and loomed over him, he wrapped his leg around Jase’s hips and arched into him invitingly.

“Yeah, fighting it for a long time now.” He smiled at Jase’s thunderstruck look. “I’m pretty much a dumbass,” he admitted, delving his fingertips under Jase’s T-shirt and pushing it up, smoothing his palms over the muscles in Jase’s back as he went, reveling in finally being able to touch him.

“Carey, have you ever—”

“Slept with a man before? Nope. You’re my first, and I can’t imagine that you wouldn’t be my only,” Carey said drily. “I’m not gay, and I’ve never been attracted to another man before. Ever.” He lifted up and peppered kisses across Jase’s cheeks as he murmured, “But I’m attracted to you, and I want you. I want you to show me what it’s like to be with you.” Sudden anxiety gripped him. “Oh my God, do you even feel the same? Jesus, did I just make a huge fool of myself here?”

“Oh fuck,” Jase moaned, coming down fully over Carey, letting his body weight press Carey deep into the mattress. “You don’t know how long I’ve wanted this, wanted you.” The truth of it was there in his eyes, the heat that burned there.

“I trust you. Show me,” Carey whispered. Jase pushed off of Carey and sat up, stripping his T-shirt and helping Carey with his. He lay back down on the pillows and gently helped Carey roll on top of him.

“I think this will be more comfortable for you,” Jase said, his fingertips brushing Carey’s stump lightly.

“I’m not gonna break, Jase,” Carey laughed. “I’m tough.”

“I know you are,” Jase said, his gaze suddenly turning into a leer. “I just want to be able to let my hands roam wherever they want, touch whatever they want. Oh God, I can’t believe this is happening.” Jase swept his palms up and down Carey’s bare back, digging his fingers in before cupping Carey’s ass and squeezing, rocking their hips together, causing them both to groan. Jase brought one of his hands up to thread through Carey’s hair, pulling him into a kiss, rough and passionate, their lips, teeth, and tongues clashing.

They kissed for endless minutes until their breathing was raspy and their cocks rock hard as they pushed against each other. Jase pulled away, and Carey groaned at the sight of his mouth, swollen, moist, and red. He had a sudden desire to see that mouth encircling his cock, and he gritted his teeth as his erection pulsed, dampening the front of his underwear. Jase gave him a knowing look, then skimmed his hand between their bodies and cupped Carey’s cock over his cargo shorts, squeezing.

Carey hissed, “Jesus, Jase.” Jase laughed low in his throat, moving his hand down to fondle Carey’s balls, the other hand pulling Carey’s head back down for another kiss.

“So hard for me,” he rasped against Carey’s lips. “So sexy.”

“I need more, Jase,” Carey moaned, circling his hips into the touch, rubbing himself against it. “God, that feels good.”

“Got plenty more for you, Carey,” Jase shushed him. “But we can’t fuck, not this time.”

“What?” Carey couldn’t help the disappointment that swept through him, and Jase quirked his lips, a pleased expression on his face.