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“There’s a reason they say third time’s the charm.”
“Not this time. And you should probably think about limiting yourself to one offer a day,” she pointed out.
“What can I say? I’m persistent and highly motivated by the idea of mid-afternoon sex in my office with my insanely hot wife on a daily basis.”
“I’ve got two ideas for you. You ready to hear them?”
“If one of them includes you naked, yes.”
“Monday afternoon, I’ll stop by your office and show you some of my very best moves.”
“Fuck, yes. And please, for the love of God, wear my favorite black stilettos.”
“Deal,” she agreed on a giggle. “Okay and now to idea number two. Let John go. Give him one hell of a severance package and tell him to apply for the new position that just opened with the Mavericks. Tell him it comes with great benefits, more than he’s currently getting paid, and tickets to any NFL game he wants to see.”
“How big of a severance package?”
“If I were in Melissa’s shoes, I’d hope it would big enough for a big fat engagement ring, my dream wedding, and one hell of a honeymoon.”
“What in the fuck kind of shoes does Melissa wear? Louboutins?”
She laughed. “I’m telling Dean you said that.”
I sighed. “You really think that’s the best option?”
“I think it’s the nicest option. John is a hard worker, but Melissa has been with Brooks Media longer. Plus, what twenty-something guy wouldn’t want to work for an NFL team?”
“Damn you drive you an expensive bargain, woman.”
“You should talk to my husband,” she said with amusement in her voice. “It took him offering to sign over his entire company to convince me to marry him.”
I chuckled fondly at her twist on the sequence of events. “Your husband sounds like a genius.”
“Yeah,” she agreed. “His brain is almost as big as his cock.”
“Keep talking like that and I’ll be on the first flight out to San Diego,” I growled into the phone.
“How about a video chat tonight once I’m all tucked into my hotel suite?”
“Consider me hard and ready, baby.”
Three months later, Georgia and I were seated in attendance at John and Melissa’s lavish wedding inside The Plaza Hotel in New York. Candles lit the room with a warm ambience, lush flowers filled the space with an exquisite aroma, and the bride was blushing and beautiful in her wedding gown and veil.
John stood proudly at the altar, listening to Melissa recite her hand-written vows, and his eyes were over-flowing with the kind of sentiment only a groom desperately in love with his bride could portray.
“And each day, you would do things that would make me fall more and more, until I not only realized I was in love in with you, but that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. I love you, John. I will always love you, no matter what obstacles may come our way because you’re my best friend.”
The groom smiled down at his bride as he cupped her cheeks and swiped a few tears from beneath her eyes, mouthing, “I love you.”
When the minister said, “You may kiss the bride,” John didn’t hold back, shouting, “Fuck yes!” as he wrapped Melissa up in his arms and kissed the hell out of her.
Everyone in attendance cheered, clapped, and laughed as Melissa and John walked down the aisle, hand-in-hand, and their newlywed eyes filled with nothing but love for one another.
And do you want to know the ironically funny thing about the sequence of events that led to John and Melissa’s three-month courtship turned marriage?
Remember that severance package Georgia told me to offer John?
When he asked me what he should tell everyone at Brooks Media about his abrupt exit, I responded with, “Hell, I don’t care. Tell them you won the lottery.”
As a joke, I tossed in a few lottery tickets to make him laugh, but the joke was on me.
That lucky bastard hit the motherfucking jackpot.
Not only did John’s severance package from Brooks Media make him thirty million dollars richer, but it allowed the happy couple to quit their jobs and spend their days traveling the world.
Rome. Paris. Amsterdam. Hawaii. Costa Rica. Greece. Sri Lanka.
Those were just a few of the destinations they’d managed in the past three months. And after they enjoyed their reception, they would be on the first flight to Belize to start the first half of the four-month long honeymoon.
Georgie and I couldn’t have been happier for them.
Mazel tov!
