Page 52 of Ruin

“It’s perfect.”

“Okay, well…”

“Thanks for today, Cam,” he says. “For letting me spend time with her. I really appreciate it.”

“You don’t have to thank me, Zeus. You’re her…” I stop myself from saying father, as Gigi hears everything, and I don’t want to risk it. “You have as much right as I do to spend time with her,” I say in a quieter voice.

“Yeah.” He exhales a sad sound, pushing his hand through his hair. “I know. It’s just…I don’t know.” He shrugs, looking helpless. “It’s surreal, you know.”

I nod because I can only imagine what he’s feeling.

“It’ll get easier,” I softly tell him.

“Yeah. But it won’t get me back those four years.”

There’s a brief silence between us.

Then, I ask, “Have you spoken to Marcel?”

He shakes his head. “I’m waiting until I’m in a place in my head where I don’t want to kill him.”

“So, you’ll be speaking to him in about ten years?” I say.

He laughs a sound from deep inside his chest. “Fuck, I’ve missed you, Dove,” he says, surprising the hell out of me.

I have so many barbs on my tongue that I want to fire out, like, Well, you wouldn’t have had to miss me if you’d kept your dick in your pants, but I bite them back and keep my mouth closed.

“I should get inside.” I take a step toward the door.

My hand is on the handle when his voice pulls me back. “Why are you with him?”

I turn my face to him. “Who?”

“Deputy Dick.”

“I’m not with him, Zeus. We’re just friends.”

“With benefits.”

“I’m not discussing this with you.”

“He’s not good enough for you.”

“And you were?”

“No.” He steps closer to me. “I was never good enough for you. I was just selfish back then, and I wanted you so fucking much.”

Until you didn’t.

I laugh, a bitter sound. “So, you cheating on me and dumping me was your way of being unselfish. Wow. I’ve heard some shit in my time, Zeus, but this…” I shake my head, disgusted.

“That’s not what I meant.”

“No? Then, what did you mean?”

Another step closer. So close that I have to tip my head back to look up into his face. He stares down into my eyes. The look in them is so intense, my insides start to tremble.

Then, he shakes his head and takes a step back. “You’re not ready to hear it yet.”