Page 96 of Songs for Libby

“That’s the idea.” I waved to them both and when I got to the back door, Nick was just pulling up.

I got into the car without incident, but once we were on the road, he had to do some fancy driving to ditch the reporter. I just closed my eyes and held on for dear life. Not that he did anything truly dangerous, but the entire situation was raising my blood pressure.

When we got back to my house, Nick hustled me to the door and then left to move his car somewhere else.

I stood just inside the door, looking at Sean where he stood in the living room. His hands were deep in his pockets and he looked almost as unsure as he had on that first day when he showed up at my door. He lifted one shoulder. “I told you you needed protection.”

My shoulders fell and I dropped my bag on the floor. “So you decided to go behind my back?”

“You were pretty adamant.”

“Yes, I was.” My voice rose just a little. “Which is why you should have tried to persuade me.”

“You wouldn’t have listened.”

I pulled off my shoes and chucked them toward the closet. “You never know unless you try, Sean.” I walked past him toward the kitchen. “I guess you’ll never know.”

“I love you,” he blurted out, like he just had to say those words—like they’d been torn from him simply because they were true.

It should have been sweet. It should have given me chills or a fluttery feeling. Instead his profession of love just stoked my anger and I turned on him. “Then respect me enough to include me in the decision-making. Or at least tell me you’re going to override me.”

“You would have been mad.”

“I’m mad now!” I threw at him. “I’m not a pawn for you to move around your chess board.”

“That’s not what I was trying to do.”

“Yes, it really was. You wanted your way and when you didn’t get it, you went behind my back.”

“Are you not glad that Nick was there today?” he asked, incredulous.

“Of course I am! But that’s not the point. Last time we talked about it, you said we’d hold off for now. You haven’t even brought it up since.”

Finally his shoulders sank and his eyes dropped to the carpet. “I’m sorry, Libby. I should have talked to you.”

Much of the tension drained out of me. “Thank you.” That’s all I had really wanted from him, just an apology. Today had proven that having security was necessary. I was grudgingly on board with that. But I needed him to know that going over my head was never the answer. “Nick can stick around and do his thing. We can talk about the details later, but right now I’d like you to go.”

Sean had always been terrible at hiding his hurt, and it showed plainly on his face now. “You’re kicking me out?”

“I’m wound up really tight right now, and I would like to go take a bath and try to relax. I’m not kicking you out because I’m mad.” Granted my annoyance and frustration was making me sound mad, but still. “I’m kicking you out because I would like some privacy.”

That explanation seemed to take a lot of his hurt away and he nodded slowly. “Can I please give you a hug before I go?”

My eyes stung, but I nodded. He rushed over and wrapped me up in his arms. I let some of my tension seep out, allowing him to comfort me. “I really am sorry,” he said into my hair. “But I’m also really glad Nick was there for you today. I don’t want anything to happen to you. If someone hurt you because of me—”

“I’m okay.” I pulled back and looked up at him.

His face was blanketed in compassion and worry as he searched my eyes. Then he dipped his head and kissed me. He pressed three short kisses to my mouth, like he couldn’t help himself, and before I knew if I wanted to respond or not, he pulled back.

“Sorry. I’ll stop.” He hugged me once more. “Okay. I’m going.” Then he turned and walked straight to the back door, locking it before he went out.