Page 153 of She Who Holds My Wrath

Footsteps approach and I don’t have to look up to know it’s her. Her presence is my sanctuary. Her aura is my only my peace.

“Korithax.” My name falling from her lips is both agony and salvation.

I turn my head slowly, taking her in. She stands just beyond arm’s reach, on the other side of the glowing runes. Her shoulder is bound tightly, blood already seeping through the bandages. Her leathers are torn from where healers cut them away, and there’s dried blood in her golden hair, and not all of it is hers.

My hands curl instinctively, the chains holding my binds to the bed rattling softly as panic floods me.

“I—” My voice breaks immediately. I swallow hard, forcing the words out. “Are you real. Are you⁠—”

“Alive,” she cuts in. “Yes.”

Relief floods as I nod once, unable to hold her gaze. Shame is a heavy, heavy thing. It presses down on my shoulders until breathing feels like penance.

“I lost control,” I rasp. “I heard you scream and⁠—”

“I know,” she says too quickly, a sharpness to her tone.

Silence stretches between us. I hate this. I hate that she has me tied down, unable to reach for her. I hate that she’s too afraid to step any closer to the monster she’s mated to.

“They took him,” she adds quietly. “To the dungeons. Alive.”

The Void surges violently, slamming against the inside of my skull with potent fury. KILL HIM.

My body strains against the restrains before I can stop it. The runes flare brighter and I can feel The Void trying to absorb the ancient magic that’s fuelling them. It burns. It burns so brutally I feel like I’m in the pits of Gehenna. The roar that escapes me is nothing short of agonising. I fall back against the bed, panting heavily through my nose as I war with The Void to stop.

“You almost killed Ezra,” she says, unflinching.

“I know.” I pant.

“You hurt Cassyr.”

“I know.” Gods, the pain is brutal. I can barely focus on her words.

“You killed—” Her voice falters. She stops herself, her jaw pulsing with restrained anger. “You hurt people who were trying to help you, Korithax. Who were trying to help me!”

I close my eyes to avoid her painful gaze. “I would have burned the realms to nothing but ash if it meant he didn’t breathe another second,” I admit. “The Void wouldn’t let me see anything else. I couldn’t hear you. I couldn’t feel anything but⁠—”

Her pain.

“I scared you,” I finish quietly.

She doesn’t deny it, and that hurts more than anything. I wearily look at her, and her expression guts me, enough so that even The Void shifts uneasily.

“I need you to understand something. I’m not angry that you were trying to protect me. I’m angry that you didn’t stop.”

She lets out a shaky exhale, and all I want in this moment is to wrap my arms around her and comfort her.

“I’m afraid,” she continues. “Not of The Void. I’m afraid of what happens if next time you don’t stop at all. That nothing can stop you. That you’ll destroy everything and everyone around you.”

“I would never hurt you,” I say fiercely.

“I know,” she whispers. “But you could hurt everyone else.”

I have no defence. No justification. Only the truth. That I am a monster made flesh.

“Keep me restrained,” I say firmly.

Her expression softens into something like pity, before she squares her shoulders. She steps towards me, crossing the ring of runes, until she’s right by my side. Her uninjured arm reaches up, her hand cupping my cheeks. Her skin is so warm, so soft. Everything I’m not.