Page 78 of On Broken Bonds

Yet it does.

Maybe because I woke up beside her this morning. Maybe because I woke up warm and feeling loved and safe for the first time in a long time.

The memory arrives uninvited. Waking in the night to find Nyx sleeping between us. Her hair smelling faintly of flowers and sweetness. The weight of her pressed against my body. The simple comfort of another person being close.

Gods. I can’t remember the last time I felt so relaxed. The last few months have been filled with work, worry, and impossible goals. Every waking moment has been spent trying to find a way to free my family. Somewhere along the way, I stopped allowing myself to want things.

Then Nyx arrived.

Now I find myself wanting things again. Dangerous things. Stupid things. Things that have no place in the middle of the Trials.

“Are you okay?” Nyx asks Thorian. She brushes a loose strand of hair from her face. “Am I too heavy?”

Thorian actually laughs. The bastard actually laughs. Then he bounces her once, earning an indignant sound.

“You weigh nothing,” he says. “Just hold on.”

“Easy for you to say.”

“Considering I could carry a hundred of you, yes.”

Nyx rolls her eyes.

I try not to smile.

I fail.

Because despite everything, despite the monsters and the swamp and the looming possibility of death, the two of them make all of it feel strangely normal.

Then I notice the way she looks at him. The way he looks at her. It’s enough to make me wonder. What exactly is happening between them? And why do I care so much?

My gaze drifts back to Nyx before I can stop it. She catches me looking. It’s just for a moment. Not long enough for either of us to react. But it is long enough for warmth to settle in my chest.

She’s scared. Exhausted. Determined. And somehow still here. Still fighting. Still willing to step into a death trap to save her sister.

We’re doing this for the same reason. Family. Love. Duty. The willingness to throw ourselves into impossible situations because the people we care about are worth more than our own safety.

I don’t know what happens after the Trials. I don’t know if any of us survive. But I want her to. I want her to make it across. I want her sister saved. I want her to have the future she keeps risking her life for. I even picture my family and I celebrating with her and her sister, eating goose and candied carrots.

Be brave, I tell myself. For your family. For hers. For the woman currently riding on another man’s back while making you question your life choices.

I draw a deep breath and turn back to Thorian.

“So,” he says. “A punch in the face.”

I grimace. “Unfortunately.”

“You sure?”

“No.”

That earns a small laugh from Nyx.

Gods help me, I like the sound.

“Good enough,” Thorian says.

“And after that I should be pissed off enough to want to kill you in my berserker state. I’ll follow you across the water. Just don’t let me catch you.”