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I can almost feel her dark pink lips lush and swollen beneath my own. Can almost see her pupils blown wide with lust, her cheeks flushed pink with arousal. The thought does something to me on a chemical level and it takes every ounce of self-control I have not to reach for her right here. Especially when I can still hear her agreeing to sleep with me, her voice soft and husky and interested.
I’ve cursed myself for turning her down a couple of dozen times since then—mostly when I’m lying in bed late at night, with an image in my head of her in those damn bitch boots and a fucking hard-on that just won’t quit.
But I don’t want her because she feels like it’s the only option. Sure as hell don’t want to sleep with her because of a stupid trip to Chile. I’ve fucked a lot of girls these last six months—because it feels good, because it’s easy, because for those few minutes when I’m inside someone I don’t have to think—but Tansy isn’t like that. She’s no snowbunny out for a quick fuck that doesn’t mean anything even while it’s happening.
No, Tansy is so much more than that—despite her easy acceptance of those ridiculous terms I set. She’s a strange amalgamation of sweet and sexy, innocent and tough, and it gets to me despite my best intentions.
Which is just one of the reasons it annoys me that she’s doing such a great job of ignoring me even as she stands here smiling.
She doesn’t respond to my compliment, but then again, I didn’t really expect her to. Instead, she focuses on Logan, who is waiting impatiently for me to come get him. “He looks happy.”
“I think he is.” It makes me feel bad. We used to do all kinds of cool things together. I used to take him on some of my boarding trips if they were just for a weekend or if he was off school. Or sometimes we’d just take off for the day, drive around until we found something cool to do.
Since the accident, we haven’t done anything like that. I’ve been too busy trying to keep shit together to worry about having fun, and as I watch him all but jumping out of his skin with excitement, I can’t help feeling like I’ve fucked up in yet another big and important way.
Then again, what else is new?
“I’m going to go get him,” I tell her, turning away abruptly as a new wave of self-loathing hits me. How many ways can I hurt the people in my life? Too many, it seems. Too fucking many.
“There’s no ramp,” I tell him as I approach the car.
Logan rolls his eyes. “No shit, Sherlock. It’s fine.”
“You sure?”
“Well, since I don’t plan on crawling up the stairs …”
“Yeah, okay.”
I bend down, start to pick him up. But before I can do more than get a grip on him, another cab pulls up on the tarmac. It’s loaded down with snowboarding gear and I watch in disbelief as Z, Ophelia, Luc and Cam pile out of it.
“What—”
“You didn’t think we were really going to let you do this alone, did you?” Cam asks, moving in for a quick hug. She smiles at Logan, leans down to ruffle his hair before moving back to the cab to grab her gear.
Z’s grinning as he approaches, backpack slung over his shoulder and snowboard under his arm.
“You’re an asshole,” I tell him.
He just raises his brows at me, cocky as shit.
“Like that’s a shock?” Ophelia asks, dropping a quick kiss on my cheek. “How you doing?”
“I’m here.”
She looks at me for a second, like she’s searching for something. Whatever it is, she must find it, because she smiles. “Yes, you are, aren’t you?”
Before I can say anything else, Tansy crosses the tarmac. “I’m so glad you could come,” she says to Z, hand extended. “Timmy is nearly jumping out of his skin he’s so excited that he’ll get to see the four of you board. Plus, his parents have been wanting to meet the man who donated the money that made this possible for their son.”
I turn to her, brow raised. “I thought it was an anonymous donor?”
“Yes, well, things change,” she says, glancing at Logan to avoid looking me in the eye. “You ready to go, dude?”
“So ready,”
he agrees.
I start to reach for him again, but Luc beats me to it, scooping my brother up like he weighs nothing—which is far from the truth. But Luc is the biggest of the three of us, with broad shoulders and huge biceps that make just about anything look easy.
