Page 20 of An Accidental Elopement

Looking at the cloth on the carpet and not him she muttered:

“The pain will only be for a moment,” because that was what both her sisters and her mother had assured her. Up until now she had not even given the pain of the experience any consideration.

“Then what?” His large warm hand came to rest on top of hers, stilling her dabbing on the carpet. “Tell me, confide in me, please. I only wish what’s best for you. You are my wife now.”

She looked at his hand resting on hers as she thought of how to explain her nervousness. She could not tell him how much she wished he would honor their vows. That she wanted him to be devoted to her and only her. He would probably mistake it for her being in love with him which would in turn probably drive him away from her even faster.

“It is simply the novelty of it I suppose. The speed with which everything has occurred,” she lied, trying to swallow but her throat was completely dry.

“I understand that. Of course, I do. And I will be patient - and gentle,” Archie assured her in such a soothing tone of voice that it almost made her cry. “Come, we will go to my room and let your maid deal with this.”

Cecilia nodded but did not rise. Archie took the cloth from her and placed it on the floor, then he held both of her hands in his and helped her stand. Cecilia still did not look at him but was glad when her maid knocked on the door a moment later. Archie took charge and instructed her on cleaning up. Then he gently led Cecilia by the hand through the adjoining door and into his room.

The bed in his room was larger, the interior more masculine with dark brown wood paneling and a dusty cerulean wallpaper. A thick carpet in dove gray covered the floor. How many women had he had in here? How many women had pleasured him? All of them would have had experience, being much better at pleasing him than Cecilia could ever be.

“I think a drink might be in order,” Archie said as he led her to a deep blue armchair by the fireplace.

Cecilia did not respond but simply looked at the fireplace. She heard him walk across the floor, pour a liquid into glasses then return and hand it to her. She thanked him and gulped down half of the glass without thinking. The burning sensation in her throat, all the way down to her stomach, woke her briefly and made her cough.

“What is this?” she exclaimed as she looked at the amber colored substance in the glass and held her hand in front of her mouth as if that could prevent her from being sick.

“Brandy,” Archie drawled and took a sip of his own glass.

Cecilia coughed again then downed the rest of the glass. The burning was not as bad the second time.

“You’re supposed to savor it, not chug it down like it’s gin,” Archie teased her, but Cecilia did not acknowledge his comment. Instead, she turned her back to him, undid her dressing gown and let it fall to the floor. She crawled into his bed and slid under the covers.

“Can we please not talk and just get it over with?” she asked the ceiling.

She could hear Archie move to her side of the bed and felt the mattress dip as he sat down next to her. He placed a hand beside her hip and leaned over her. She could feel him studying her as she was staring at the ceiling.

“Cecilia, please, what is going on?” he asked gently.

She shook her head as she felt her bottom lip start to quiver. There was no way that she would be able to utter the words, even if she wanted to.

“Cecilia, please look at me,” he pleaded now. She could hear how distraught he was. Perhaps even how hurt he was by the entire situation. It was probably new to him that a woman did not simply throw herself at him.

“Please,” he repeated, and his tone of voice made her move her eyes from the ceiling towards his for only a second. The ocean blue eyes were soft with emotions and Cecilia felt the pity radiate from him. It made the tears start to spill from her eyes.

“Cecilia,” he murmured and gently heaved her up to a sitting position to put his arms around her. Now she was crying in earnest. She had thought that she could at least be stoic tonight and give him what he wanted, but now she was ruining that plan as well.

He stroked her hair and her back with his large warm hands.

“You know I will not hurt you? You know that I only want to please you,” he murmured. “To make you feel good.”

She nodded because she had never expected anything else from him. He was patient and gentle with her, but he did not seem to understand that she was crying over the heartbreak that would one day befall her. One day very soon.

“It was a mistake on my part to assume that you would be ready to sleep with me,” he murmured against her temple, then placed a gentle kiss there. “I should have known that you needed time.” He placed another kiss on her forehead now. “I will give you all the time you need.” He kissed her other temple.

Cecilia did not dare to breathe at the feel of his kisses. They felt just as great as they had two days ago, but she knew there could be nothing behind them. This was what he did, what he excelled at. Coaxing women into his bed.

She dried her eyes with the back of her hand and sniffled a little.

“It’s fine. I’m fine,” she murmured. “It’s just nerves. I... I would like to do it.”

Archie sat completely still.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea. We should wait, at least until tomorrow.”