Page 36 of Playing with Fire

Right. The CDC kept measurements of all certified employees in case of emergencies, allowing the organization to clothe anyone caught handling situations without being able to pack a bag first. Dresses were easier, as fashion designers hadn’t quite figured out how to standardize jean sizes.

“I feel indecent, Professor Yale.”

“Stop complaining. Just be happy the CDC is footing the bill again. Can you please stop trying to get yourself killed? You’re going to give me an ulcer.”

“So, did they actually call you for the secondary authorization?”

“Yes.”

At least protocols had been followed. It probably wouldn’t save me from a lengthy interrogation, but maybe I’d survive without losing my certification. Still, it wouldn’t hurt to ask. “I’m dead, aren’t I?”

“No.”

“Wait. What? Why not? I ordered an entire skyscraper to be napalmed. This isn’t like torching a single apartment or something. It was an entire building. I reduced it to rubble.” My voice had gone up a full octave, and I cringed. “Sorry.”

Professor Yale chuckled. “We have full video evidence of everything that went on in the building. The camera Officer Downing provided was uploading directly to the CDC as well as to her portable monitor. You checked the meter per protocol, reset the meter when you weren’t sure if the reading was correct, and took every single precaution to ensure the public’s safety. You then did a full examination of the site. While you pulled the trigger quickly on giving a napalming order, there is zero reason for anyone at the CDC to question your judgment.”

I pinched myself. It hurt. “Did hell freeze over?”

Shaking his head, Professor Yale grabbed the empty bag, crumpled it up, and tossed it in the garbage can. “No. After the difficulty neutralizing the gorgon dust in your apartment, we decided to go with high-intensity napalm—a new blend, infused with magic to reach higher temperatures. The bomb techs forgot to account for the higher ignition point. We’re very impressed—we weren’t sure how the hell we were going to get the napalm lit, and you went and did our job for us. That said, was it really necessary to roll around in it while on fire? After the building had collapsed, the reporters captured a few clips of you playing in the debris. They really love the clip of you belching white-hot fire near the end of your drunken rampage. The giggling and chanting of ‘napalm’ over and over is coming in as a close second favorite. The CDC issued a statement you were chosen for your breed’s ability to ensure the new blend of napalm worked. You should be grateful; we kept your name out of the news.”

I groaned. “Please tell me you’re joking.”

“Me? Joke?”

“I was on the news? As a unicorn?”

“Just be grateful the photograph of Chief Quinn carrying you to the ambulance hasn’t reached the media. Expect blackmail.”

I sucked in a breath and widened my eyes. “Oh, no. You’re serious, aren’t you?”

“Very. At least you won’t have much paperwork to do. I thought you’d appreciate if I handled it for you. All you need to do is review and sign. Even better, I have a check with your name on it. The bad news? There’s an official lifetime ban on you eating magically infused napalm without authorization. There will be no drunken revelries without it being cleared by the CDC first.”

I sighed. “It’s not like I went on a drunken rampage on purpose.”

Professor Yale thumped my shoulder. “Ready to get out of here? Chief Quinn is expecting you. At least this time you’ll be able to enjoy a more traditional stay. I’m sure you want to sleep off your hangover.”

“At Chief Quinn’s house.”

“Yes.”

My life had somehow become very strange. Instead of complaining about it, I accepted the inevitable with a nod. What else could I do? I stared down at the little yellow dress. If I squinted, I was pretty sure I could see my black bra through it. Damn. I was giving the dress a tug to pull the hem down so it was a little closer to a comfortable length when I noticed the hair on my legs.

Crap. I really needed to shave.

Chapter Ten

I might start thinking you like the man if you keep acting this way.

At a little after eight in the morning, Professor Yale pulled into Quinn’s driveway. Armed with a folded check, I got out of the old man’s car. The house looked dark and quiet.

The roses lining his walkway caught my eye, and I blushed at the memory of having eaten one as a unicorn. To cover my embarrassment, I leaned down and stared through the window. “I’m going to wake him up, aren’t I?”

“No. I called him right before we left the hospital. Go get some sleep. You’re so tired you don’t even know which end is up anymore. I might start thinking you like the man if you keep acting this way, and you’d regret that later. Have fun at your sleepover party, little girl.”

Groaning, I stepped away from Professor Yale’s car and flipped my middle finger at him. “We need to have a long talk about your personal dictionary. It needs adjusted. In what alternate dimension do I have fun with Chief Quinn?”

He laughed. “Take care and get some sleep, Bailey.” Backing out of the driveway, he drove away with a departing wave.