Page 57 of Client from Hell

I’d felt more than seen them in the horror house on Oak Boulevard.

“I wouldn’t complain if he flounced around in his current state, and I’m sure Darian would enjoy the consequences. Hey, Lucifer? Is Jonas supposed to have down on his wings?”

“It’s fur,” the Devil replied. “He’s been cuddling enough with Sandra that she’s already working on him. I suspect she’s nipped him in her sleep a few times hard enough to draw blood.”

Well, crap. “I guess that supports my new species as a spicy pony with bite.”

Diana laughed. “And she’s going to have a thicker coat like the cindercorns. Nice. You’ll appreciate that thick coat, Sandra. Some layers of hell get cold, and if you’re sent to them, you’ll probably make the run on your hooves once you’re shifting. Any idea where you’re headed? Jonas is already anxious, although he hasn’t quite gotten down from his perch yet.”

“He’s fine,” the Devil replied. “He’ll relax in a few minutes, and then I’ll take him to Sandra to see about these otters she stole.”

“I thought she was supposed to be talking to them,” Darlene said in the background.

“Spicy ponies with bite apparently have excessive amounts of free will and enjoy thinking for themselves. But she got results, so as far as I’m concerned, the expedition was a success. If the otter species is endangered, I’ll personally attend to the animals. Diana, ask Sandra how many animals were in that location, please. I hadn’t checked to see if it was an active lab. Our information hadn’t implied it would be doing research on site.”

I considered the number of cages, the number of animals they’d bred in captivity, and the dumpster. “At least several hundred, I’d guess. Maybe more. I only went for one part of the lab, took what I could, and bailed. They had a lot of animals there, from cheetahs to wolves to more otters. The animals are probably drugged. They were too calm and happy.”

“Probably pixie dust,” Diana informed me. “The better labs in their operations use pixie dust to keep the animals happy in confinement. Did any of the animals seem to be sick?”

“Not that I could tell. The cages were really clean, too. They were in good health. I made copies of all the feeding schedules and notes on the individual animals so we could look at it. Every cage had specific instructions, and it looked like they were accounting for the animal’s preferences.”

“Go find a place to park. Jonas just slinked off to get changed, as his wings made a mess of his shirt.”

Damn. “And so I am punished.”

“If you’re lucky, Lucifer will nudge Jonas to keep his wings out. If Darlene is to be believed, little beats having a nice, big pair of wings to play with.”

“Wings?” I asked, raising a brow while heading in the direction of the park I’d spotted on the navigation system.

Diana snickered. “Or so she says. Drive safely and expect trouble.”

While I waited in the empty parking lot of what had once been a public park, I played with the baby otters. They viewed my fingers as fascinating toys, and while young, they had sharp, tiny teeth capable of piercing through my skin. Their squeaking sealed the deal.

If they wanted to gnaw my fingers to the bone in their quest to have a good time, I would let them.

Half an hour after arriving at the park, Lucifer and Jonas appeared, and I sneezed at the hint of brimstone accompanying them. “Sorry, Jonas. I hadn’t thought the aversion would freak you out that much.”

The incubus, who had a reddish brown coating of fur with white tips on his wings, scowled at me. “I’m so punishing you for that.”

“It’s not a punishment if she likes it,” the Devil muttered.

I grinned. “I will accept any such punishments with a smile. Still, I didn’t mean to terrify you. I wanted to make sure everybody cleared out, and I haven’t made a rune for you yet. I’ll do that soon.” After making sure the baby otters were safe in their towel nest, I took them over to Lucifer. “What are these?”

The Devil cradled the otters against his chest, and he wiggled his fingers for the animals with a faint smile. “This is a rare color mutation of a North American river otter. There was some minor genetic manipulation to get the red fur on their paws, but they’re a common enough species in an uncommon color. This line of otters has been in captivity for at least a decade. And yes, you are correct. They’ve been treated very well. The lab is a temporary holding from the looks of it. They have a better habitat. These little ones remember the other habitat; they were born in it, and they were taken to the cages later. They’re infected with the same strain of lycanthropy you are, although you’re now attuned. Don’t worry about them biting you. They can’t contract animal strains, so it’s no problem if they’re exposed to your blood.”

“What will happen to them?”

“They’ll get a habitat at your house. What’s one more otter habitat? I’ll fetch the entire lot of them, as they were raised as one big family. I will warn you, these are heavily inbred, so they’ll have ongoing health problems. I can resolve some of the genetic problems in time, but it’s something that has to be done gradually. They won’t live as long as other otters of the same type, but any offspring they have will not suffer from the same problems. I’ll scramble the genetic code in their reproductive systems to prevent it,” Lucifer stated, and he took the time to pet both of the baby otters. “They’ve been handled a lot, so you’ll find they’re affectionate. You’ll need to spend an hour or two a day with the otters of this breed. For now, I’ll recruit some of the behaving fucking assholes to play with them as rewards for good behavior.”

“Thank you.”

Jonas sighed, settled his wings against his back, and peeked at my baby otters. “I about had a heart attack because of these little guys?”

“Are they boys?”

“They’re both boys,” Lucifer confirmed. “And yes, you did. I bet you can teach them to be evil little pranksters just like you with time.”

That got the incubus to grin. “All right, Sandra. I’m going to forgive you for that, only because I made you go into that damned horror house. That had to have been equivalent to falling into a room with hungry lions and tigers when you can’t teleport.”