Page 54 of Whiskers on Kittens

“You were intoxication and hangover free at that point. Your virus is just riled and wants a taste of male wolf.”

At least my virus wasn’t insisting on a taste of all males, which had been a battle during puberty. “Should I just ask for the cuffs now, because that sounds like I’ve been busted.”

Easton’s laughter rumbled, and he set me down on my feet. “I might be a bit of a loner, but I’ve been around enough lycanthropes to know we like to play, especially when other lycanthropes are involved. You don’t know a lot of other lycanthropes, do you?”

“I mean, I do, but I certainly don’t go jumping into a pool while wearing a cocktail dress with them!”

Easton took his time looking me over. I joined him, determining the cocktail dress clung in rather alluring fashions. “That’s probably a good thing.”

I tried to pluck at the material, which resisted my efforts. “I’m going to need help escaping this.”

Darlene snickered, took hold of my arm, and waved Easton away. “We do not have time for you to discover your personal chemistry today, so you can go sulk and imagine just how lovely she is under the dress while I help her escape it. If we break it getting you out of it, I’ll get you another one. I dressed you perfectly.”

She really had. “Can I at least pay for one of the dresses? I mean, I didn’t protest the destruction of this one.”

“It was given to you with the knowledge it would not survive the day. I’ll make sure you’re appropriately dressed for this evening’s outing. And if you do decide it’s nap time, well, those louts can lament about how their women walked off without them for a while.”

I went with the succubus, waited until we were safely out of hearing range, and muttered, “Clearly, I need to not indulge in alcohol while he’s around. I was out for his blood!”

Darlene patted my back. “It’s okay, Kelsie. Your virus likes him so she wants to get her claim in on him before some other female does. Let the big, bad wolf enjoy the attention. He knows you’re out for him, his virus knows, and he’s enjoying the positive attention. He’s been in Chicago long enough he’s learned most of the local women feel he’s, well, diseased.”

Fucking prejudices. “Why is it I got away without even worrying about that? It happens to me, too—I just don’t care.”

“Your virus is unusually patient, you’re used to dealing with corporations, and if you won’t let some corporate rat beat you down, you’re certainly not letting some prejudiced idiot win. That’s the only difference. He cares about how others view him. You don’t. You’re confident of your value, and you do not need anyone telling you what you’re worth. He lives to serve the public, and the public is afraid of him.”

I sighed. “That poor wolf.”

“It’ll get better for him. You two are going to bring a great deal of change to Chicago. You’re going to finish what that cute little otter started.”

“Otter?”

“The one-eyed shapeshifter cop.”

Right. I’d followed the case rather closely, but I hadn’t known his species. “He’s an otter?”

“Yep. He’s an adorable little otter, an Asian small-clawed to be specific. His mate is an American badger. Much like you and your wolf, they’re very well balanced. He’s the heart of their pairing, and she’s the sword with a temper problem. Easton is all heart who likes acting like he’s brawn. I mean, with that much mass? He’s definitely brawny. He’s brainy, too. You’re well balanced. You both bring more heart than you know what to do with to the table but he’s definitely the sword of the relationship. You’re the brains, and if you weighed more than thirty-five pounds when shifted, you’d like to be the brawn. You are not at all brawny.”

I sighed as it was true. “A little brawn would be nice.”

“You will have to suffer through watching that wolf be brawny. Just let him enjoy being hunted for a while. It’s good for his ego. His virus will tire of enjoying the show soon enough, then you’ll engage in the stereotypical lycanthrope brawls before one of you successfully lands a bite. Or you’ll skip the biting and drag each other to bed. I’m sure you’ll figure it out. I’m even going to do something my idiot in there will dislike, which involves providing birth control until you’re ready to add kittens and puppies to the mix. Since you’re doing great work, you can even tell me how many puppies and kittens you want, and you can request some girls.”

“The first litter should be all boys, then the second one can be all girls so that the big brothers of the pack can protect their little sisters,” I informed her in a solemn tone.

Darlene laughed. “And since Easton will be tremendously excited to even have one puppy or kitten, he won’t suspect meddling until it’s too late and he’s drowning in kittens and puppies. There are worse ways to go. The kittens will do an excellent job of convincing your wolf he needs an entire pack. However, I make no promises he isn’t going to bring work home with him.”

“Our house is large enough to handle a few strays of any species except horses. My house and yard are unsuitable for horses. It’s also unsuitable for goats and anything with hooves, however adorable those things are. And four-footed creatures, like llamas, also do not fit.”

“I like that you know llamas and alpacas technically do not have hooves.”

“They look like hooves, which is generally close enough, although they are technically feet.” I shrugged. “If he wants a horse, a cow, or a llama, he will have to find a farm that will rent him a stall or whatever they need to be happy and healthy.”

“That is how you end up with an operating cattle ranch, Kelsie. If you start going he can have cows and horses if he wants, he’s going to start looking for a ranch where he can have cows and horses,” Darlene warned me. “Your cop is a closet cowboy.”

Goodness. I might get to watch him in a hat, tight jeans, a button-up, and boots wrangling horses and cows?

How so very woe was me.

Darlene led me to one of the smaller bedrooms, flexed her hand, and transformed it into a snow leopard’s paw armed with sharp, pointy claws, which she used to shred the dress right off me. “Hop in the shower and get your hair clean. I’ll get you dressed. And however much I teased the louts about taking a nap, you need lunch and your virus is going to be quite active, so you won’t be able to nap even if you wanted to. Lucy comes with a gift of blueprints and a good idea of our targets for tonight’s operation.”