Page 113 of Dance of Stars and Ashes

“Thank gods,” Zarya said.

“It does stand to reason, given your gifts, that you should find yourself with a paramadhar,” Row said. “You will need to tell him. To complete the bond and use it to its full potential, you must both inscribe twin marks on your skin. The binding is irreversible and will tether his life to yours while stabilizing and protecting your magic.”

“What if we don’t complete it? Is that a choice we get to make?”

Row shook his head. “It is, but I don’t know what happens if you don’t. My knowledge of paramadhar is limited.”

“I don’t know if I can ask him to do that, anyway,” she said. “Give his life for mine? What does that make him to me? A kind of servant?”

Row canted his head. “In essence, yes. It’s like a knight’s squire or a queen’s advisor, though obviously, it goes much deeper than that.”

“I don’t know,” she said. “If we’re… involved, that seems like it could get complicated.”

Row nodded. “Paramadhar were far more common before the Hanera Wars when Aazheri magic was strongest. Personal relationships beyond the bond were generally discouraged for those reasons.”

“Nothing is simple here on the outside, is it?” she asked, and Row chuckled.

“I don’t want to say ‘be careful what you wish for’”—Zarya shot him a dark look, and he raised his hands in surrender—“so I won’t.”

“Good,” Zarya said, folding her arms and sitting back.

“You will need to tell him,” Row said after a moment. “If he really is your paramadhar, then he has a right to know and a right to choose if he will serve in that role.”

She nodded. “I’ll talk to him when we get back.”

“I know you’ll do the right thing,” he said, patting her on the knee before he stood, moving to the side of the boat to converse with Kindle and discuss whatever it was they had in common.

Zarya watched Rabin for another moment before she made her way back to his side of the boat. He’d moved, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. She sat down and rubbed his back, hoping to offer some relief.

“How did it go?” he asked, turning to look up at her.

“It’s fine.” She waved her hand.

“He hates me, I suppose.”

“Do you care if he does?”

“No, I don’t. Unless that creates a problem for you.”

“He doesn’t hate you. He’s just being protective.”

Rabin sat up and leaned back, taking her hand and placing it on his heart.

“Let him be a little protective, Zarya. That’s his job in whatever parent-type role he plays in your life. You’re fortunate to have that.”

She considered his words, knowing he was right. Given Rabin’s relationship with his own father, he’d probably welcome what she had with Row.

She’d wanted a family, and he was offering her one. The only one she was punishing by refusing to forgive him was herself. Mistakes had been made, and Row had apologized. No one was perfect, and she would make the choice to move past it once and for all.

Zarya sat back, chewing on the nail of her thumb before she looked over at Rabin’s beautiful face.

“I can’t believe you actually thanked him this morning,” she said.

He laughed darkly, squeezing her hand tighter.

“Well, I was extremely grateful.”

THIRTY-TWO