Page 89 of Dance of Stars and Ashes

“Do you really think so?”

“The darkness is another way to define the limits of magic. Much like your spirit anchor, it simply offers added leverage to wield power. Everyone puts too much stock into trying to define it as an antithesis to other types of power. It isn’t good or bad, nor is anyone who possesses it. The only thing that locking it away achieved was to limit the extent of what’s possible.”

Rabin gave Zarya a careful look then, and she wondered if, somehow, he had gleaned her secret. Could she tell him? Zarya didn’t trust him enough for that yet, but a sharp and jagged piece shook loose inside her. At least Rabin might not condemn her for this thing she carried inside her.

“When you held my hand during the blight attack,” she said, “I felt my magic grow more powerful.”

He blinked, a line forming between his brows.

“I know. I felt it, too,” he said, giving her another meaningful look.

She’d given a lot of thought to the idea that he might be her paramadhar. Did that mean he would also be forced to align with the darkness? Would he balk at the idea if he didn’t view it as an evil entity like everyone else?

“Do you think that means something?” she asked. She didn’t know how common knowledge of paramadhar was. She’d considered asking Dhawan, but after he’d rebuked her for asking questions about the vanshaj, she’d been wary of speaking with him. Plus, she had a weird feeling he’d been trying to prevent her from unlocking her nightfire after that useless lecture about blocks of magic.

“It might,” he said. “Do you have a theory?”

She shook her head. “No. I don’t.”

Rabin scrutinized her, but she turned away before they continued riding.

“Is it my turn to ask a question?” he asked.

“Yes?”

“Why didn’t you tell Row I lifted the binding curse?”

Zarya rolled her eyes at Row’s back. “He doesn’t need to know everything.”

Amusement sparked in Rabin’s gaze. “You told Yasen, though. About us?”

“There is no ‘us,’” she said pointedly, but all he did was give her a knowing smirk. She sighed. “He dragged it out of me. The forest. All of it.”

“You’ve become close friends.”

Zarya smiled. “We have. I don’t know what I would do without him now.”

“I’ve always thought he was too good for this miserable family.”

“Well, your family sure is something,” Zarya said as Rabin tossed her a rueful smile.

“Maybe now is a good time to tell me what sort of relationship you have with my brother?”

Zarya wrinkled her nose. “Do we have to talk about that?”

“Vik and I haven’t spoken in years, and I know I have bridges to mend.”

“I don’t think what we did last night will help you on that front.”

“Tell me,” he said with that same authority that had made her crumple like a dried leaf last night.

She sighed before she answered.

“He was one of the first people I met when I came to the city, and he was kind to me. I thought he was handsome, and I enjoyed his attention.” She shrugged. “I don’t have much experience with relationships, but I did know what I felt.”

“Which was?” he asked, his voice a low, irritated snarl.

“Gods, don’t get all possessive on me. I didn’t even know you existed then.”