Page 70 of Fate of the Sun King

I wonder how long this feeling of living on the edge of nothing will persist. When will this feel solid and not like an illusion about to be pulled out from under us?

The far end of the hall opens into a wide space where couples dance, spinning in circles to the strains of an entire orchestra outfitted in green and bronze. Beyond that is a long dais where the king and queen sit. Nadir, Etienne, and Mael are already at the front.

Nadir lounges next to Cedar, one leg casually slung over the other, chatting with the king. He looks up as I approach, his gaze sweeping over me in a way that makes my knees weak.

Suddenly, I want nothing more than to be alone with him as pressure expands in my chest. The words perch on my tongue, waiting to release and set off what I’m sure will be a chain reaction that marks a permanent alteration in the course of our lives.

My magic surges under my skin, battering me to the point of bruising. It refuses to stay away from him for much longer.

His head tilts, his expression probing, and I realize that I’ve been staring again. How long have I been standing here? By the skeptical look Tristan is giving me, it’s been way too long not to be weird.

“You all right?” he asks, and I nod.

Sure. Not really.

Throwing my shoulders back, I approach the dais and bend at the waist in greeting to the king and queen. They stand and return my bow.

My gaze returns to Nadir, who’s wearing his usual black, though it’s obviously not the same blood-covered clothing he arrived in.

“How on earth did you manage to find the only black clothing in the entire kingdom?” I ask, and he smirks.

“I have so many secrets, Lor.”

I roll my eyes as Cedar and Elswyth both embrace me warmly. It’s so… cozy.

I really want to trust that these Imperial Fae have our best interests at heart. They’re our family. They know our secrets and say they’ll keep them. I’m going to need all the allies I can find. Even if this weren’t about seizing my crown, I want a family. I want the comfort and safety of people who love us.

More importantly, I want that for Tristan and Willow.

A server approaches with a silver tray balanced on her hand and offers us all a drink. I pick up a small crystal glass filled with pale lilac liquid.

“The best Noma Violetta we have in our cellar,” Cedar says, proudly gesturing to my cup. “It packs a punch, though.”

I smile and take a sip that is both sweet and bitter and melts pleasantly through my limbs. I roll my shoulders, enjoying the sensation and deciding that I’m going to dance a lot tonight.

The current song comes to an end, the final notes echoing in the room as every eye turns to the front. Cedar and Elswyth stand with their hands clasped. They raise their free arms and then bow to the watching crowd.

“Welcome!” Cedar says, his deep voice booming through the hall. “As winter comes upon us again, let us all gather to celebrate the changing of the season. Our stores are full, and there is food to last us through the season. So please, drink up, have fun, and enjoy tonight!”

A chorus of cheers circulates through the crowd, and then Cedar and Elswyth sweep forward on smooth steps to the center of the dance floor. The music starts up again as they begin twirling before dozens more couples join them.

Over the next hour, I lose myself in the exuberance and the careless ease of people without too much on their minds. I’ve tried one of everything on the massive food table—it all tastes even better than it looks. Venison tartare with a raspberry reduction. Wild boar rosemary pâté. Forest mushroom toasts spread with goat cheese and honey.

I make another mental note to travel across Ouranos solely to taste the foods in every region. I wonder what delicacies they eat in the star queendom of Celestria. Moonbeam pie, perhaps?

Eventually, I find myself seated next to Elswyth as we watch the dancers swirling around the room.

“Are you having fun?” she asks.

“I am.”

“I’m so glad you could stay for tonight.”

I smile, my gaze circulating through the crowd, finding Nadir on the far side of the room. He’s talking with Mael and a male Woodlands Fae.

I study him, appreciating every line of his shoulders and arms. The way his biceps swell against the black fabric. The narrow taper of his waist and the curve of his strong thighs. His face is my favorite, though. Those burning eyes that hide nothing from me. The way that eyebrow arches in a way that pisses me off but also makes me want to fall to my knees. That mouth capable of such biting wit and the filthy words that keep me awake and restless at night.

He’s my challenge and my summit, and I am being tested in the deepest possible way.