Page 169 of Queen of Shadows and Ruin

“Of course,” Row said, sinking down next to her. He tentatively wrapped his arms around Asha and kissed her temple as if afraid she might shatter under his touch.

Then Zarya and Rabin followed the others out with their hands clasped. Zarya stopped and peered over her shoulder one more time, and Rabin glanced back to witness Row and Asha hugging as they sobbed against one another.

Zarya turned to look at Rabin with a smile on her face. They were getting the second chance she’d wanted.

“I’m so happy,” she whispered. After they left the room, Zarya added, “I know we almost died in Andhera, but if we hadn’t gone to see the king, we might never have found her.”

Her expression bordered on hopeful.

Possibly, but he still couldn’t forgive himself for what he’d done.

“Let’s go back to bed,” he said, taking her hand again. “You need rest, too.”

“Rabin,” someone called behind them a moment later. He stopped in his tracks, recognizing Ekaja’s voice. Her rapid footsteps approached, and he spun around to face her.

“Can we talk?” she asked. “I’d like a chance to speak with you alone.”

Dark circles ringed her eyes, and her normally straight posture was curving in on itself.

“Anything you have to say to me, you can say in front of Zarya,” he answered, his hand tightening around hers.

Ekaja dipped her chin. “Very well. I wanted to speak with her, anyway. Is there somewhere private we can talk?”

“Our room,” Zarya said, looking up at him for confirmation.

He nodded and headed down the corridor, tugging Zarya along. At the sound of Ekaja’s sharp footsteps, it took everything in him not to look back. Her betrayal was one of the worst hurts he’d ever known.

Finally, they reached the room where Zarya and Rabin had been recovering for the past week. Their single beds had been removed, and now they shared a large one against the far wall. Zarya fell asleep against him every night while he stared at her beautiful sleeping face, hating himself for nearly getting her killed.

Zarya sat beside Rabin on a divan under the window while Ekaja took the armchair across from them. Rabin said nothing, waiting for her to start.

Ekaja swallowed nervously and rubbed her palms on her thighs.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I made a huge mistake. I let him talk me into it. I truly didn’t believe he would hurt you.”

Rabin exhaled a derisive breath. “What did he share with you? How much did you know?”

“That… he was sending you into Taaranas. That he would use Zarya to break the seal.”

“And you didn’t think any of that might hurt us?”

Ekaja stared at him, her lip quivering as a single tear slid down her cheek. He’d never seen her cry before. Until this moment, he didn’t even think she was capable of it.

“I made a mistake,” she said softly. “One I will regret for the rest of my life. You have every right to be furious, but I only hope that someday you might find it in your heart to forgive me.”

Rabin’s jaw ticked. It was obvious she was feeling a lot right now. She was sorry, and she’d been right that Abishek would have found someone else if she’d been unwilling to help. Still, it didn’t mean he was ready to forgive her yet.

“I’m not sure if I can,” he said. “I’ll need time to think about it.”

She nodded as another tear tracked down her cheek. “I’ll do anything to make it up to you. I tried to talk him out of it. That’s why he made me ride with you in the carriage… he was punishing me.”

Rabin braced his elbows on his knees, considering that information. They were all silent as his thoughts tumbled with memories of Ekaja and the moments they’d shared. She’d been his rock when it felt like his world was falling apart, and he knew he would miss having her in his life.

“You said you wanted to speak to me as well,” Zarya asked after a few moments.

Ekaja sniffed and wiped her cheek with the back of her hand. “The king is dead, and you are his heir. Andhera is now yours. When will you return home to take your crown?”

Zarya blinked. Rabin could tell from her expression that this hadn’t occurred to her yet. The last thing in the world he wanted to do was to return to Andhera, but if that’s what she desired, he would follow.