Page 45 of Queen of Shadows and Ruin

Yasen worried about his old friend, who no longer sounded like the man he’d known. He’d never made him feel second best.

And then, despite his best efforts to keep her at arm’s length, he’d let Zarya in, too. She’d also made it impossible not to. But she was destined for big things, and all he knew was that he was terrified the world might take her from him, too.

“You okay?” Miraan asked, slicing through his maudlin thoughts.

He tipped a wry grin at the prince, prepared to make a joke. This was his defense. The armor he wore. Always playing the role of the irreverent lest anyone think he felt or cared too much. It helped keep people at a distance, never coming too close.

It took a special person to see past it.

Yasen approached Miraan, wrapping an arm around his waist, deciding to confess the truth instead. They were nearly the same height, though Yasen had an inch or two over him. “I’m… worried,” he admitted as he ran his thumb along the line of Miraan’s jaw. His rough stubble pricked the tip with a soft rasp.

“I am, too,” he replied. “You don’t have to come. Return to Zarya if you want.”

Yasen blinked, searching for any judgment in that statement, but he found none. All he saw was Miraan’s worry and concern.

“You might be safer there,” he added after a moment. “It would make me feel better.”

Yasen shook his head. “And miss all the fun?”

Miraan gave him a severe look. He was very serious all the time. Yasen lived for those tiny moments when he actually loosened up, but this thing between them was so new. Surrounded by the chaos following them across Rahajhan, whatever they were building felt like delicate crystals, ready to shatter at the slightest breath.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Yasen said. “Zarya has Rabin to look after her.”

“And who’ll look after you, Yas?”

“I can take care of myself.” At that, he released Miraan and began stomping towards the city, done with this conversation. When Miraan didn’t follow, he called over his shoulder. “C’mon. We need you to do your magic thing to get us inside.”

After another moment, he heard Miraan following with a huff and mumbling something under his breath that sounded distinctly like “Wish he’d just let me in.”

Yasen chose to ignore it as they made their way around the wall, arriving at the same gate they’d entered when Miraan helped bust them out of the royal dungeon. He opened it with a thread of magic, and they slipped through the city’s quiet alleys towards Operation Starbreak.

When they arrived at the house, they used their secret knock and waited, hoping someone was inside. From their exchanges with Vikas, they knew most of the resistance had relocated to a secret spot in the forest.

It took a minute for the door to pop open, revealing Ajay, looking a bit rumpled and bleary-eyed but healthy and whole. His face cracked into a wide, happy smile.

“You’re back!” he said, stepping aside to admit them into the house. “We’ve been so worried.” He kept up a stream of chatter, barely pausing as he led them into the kitchen and immediately set some water to boil. “Tell me everything that’s been happening.”

A moment later, Row appeared in the doorway. He looked terrible, his complexion sallow and dark circles ringing his eyes.

“Yasen,” he breathed. “How’s Zarya?”

He strode over to the island where they were all seated, his hands clenching into fists.

“She’s fine,” he assured him. “I promise. Rabin is with her and won’t let anything happen to her. Abishek welcomed us with open arms.”

Row peered at him with a suspicious look. “You sensed nothing amiss?”

“I don’t think so.” He shared a look with Miraan, who nodded to confirm the same. “She seems quite comfortable with him, to be honest.”

“When is she coming back? Is she coming back?”

His expression was so full of tortured hope that even Yasen had to feel bad for him. He explained the issues with their Bandhan and Zarya’s sixth anchor and that as soon as they’d met with the king’s mystic, they would return to help clean up this mess.

“I’ve never heard of such a thing,” Row said. “But I suppose any lore around the sixth anchor is secretive and rather unknown. I might visit Thriti later to discuss it with her.”

“I’m sure Zarya would appreciate that,” Yasen said.

“Tell us what’s been happening in the city,” Miraan asked. “We’re here to do what we can.”