Page 134 of Storm Caller

“I want to see Mom,” I say. “I want her in my life.”

I don’t have to admit the rest. We both know there is no future for him and me. At most, we can find a sort of begrudging tolerance, but I refuse to let my mother go.

“Don’t take her away from me. Please.”

“I’m going to lose everything I’ve worked for,” he says, sidestepping my question.

“Because of me.”

“Do you want me to tell you otherwise? Your defection. Your refusal to marry Knox. It all sowed doubt in everyone’s minds about my ability to keep control of the city. If I couldn’t even manage one teenage girl . . .”

“I’m not a girl,” I say. “Not anymore.”

“I know that, too. And I understand the decisions you made were because I refused to listen. I know you think I’m incapable of admitting my mistakes, but I’m not.”

“This wasn’t my fault. And it wasn’t fair of you to blame me.”

He nods. “You’re right, but all I wanted to do was protect this city.”

I watch him, realizing we’ve had such similar yet disparate goals all along. I don’t think I like it. I don’t want to understand him. I don’t want to find common ground. We might both wish for the safety of New Manhattan and the people we love, but we’ll never see eye to eye about how to achieve that.

“So, what about Mom?”

He blows out a breath. “Call your mother . . .” His voice hitches before he adds, “I don’t know what the future holds for me, but if something were ever to happen, then you need to take care of her. She wouldn’t survive on her own.”

He studies me, and I study him right back.

Something is making him nervous.

“Of course I’ll take care of her,” I say, offended that he would suggest otherwise. I’m not the one who’s been hurting for all these years. “That’s never been a question.”

He gives me another long look, something almost like shame flashing over his expression. “I know.”

I peer up at the sky, where clouds are gathering. I scratch my wrist and then snap my hands apart when I catch my father’s stare.

“I want to know more about it,” he says softly. “What’s it like?”

I shake my head. “I’m not sure I’m ready to talk about this with you.”

“That’s fair.”

“I should go. I need to get back to school.”

I stand up and stare down at the man who has caused me so much pain. The man who tried to break me into pieces without a second thought. I can never forgive him, but maybe I can find peace in the idea that, in his own misguided way, he was trying to be a father.

He watches me, and I don’t know what else to say.

Goodbye seems inadequate, and see you later would be a lie.

So I don’t say anything.

I just turn around and walk away.

48

After that night, rumors circulate that Garret Dire has been stripped of his title and banished from the Extinguishers. They must have learned that his key card was used the night we broke Edward out of the Tempestade.

Do I feel bad about it? Not really.