Page 108 of Stalkers Anonymous

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I don’t remember walking down the stairs.

I come back to myself in the passenger seat with Tyler driving. At some point, I must have handed him the keys. He’s pulled us off Hailey’s street and parked a few blocks over, under a dying streetlight. He’s watching me like he’s waiting for me to crack.

“That went about as well as it was going to go,” he says finally, breaking our silence.

“She didn’t say it was over.”

“No. She didn’t.” He sighs, running a hand through his hair.

“She said she needed space.”

“Yeah.”

“That’s better than it being over, right?”

“Yeah, Cole.”

I drop my head back against the headrest and close my eyes.

There’s a fucked-up part of me that actually wants to ask him to drive me back. To park across from her building and watch her door until sunrise. I want to be the last line between her and every bad thing out there.

I don’t say it. I can’t.

I broke her trust. I’m not going to rebuild it by doing the same shit over again.

“Take me home.”

“Yeah.” Tyler puts the truck in drive. “Yeah, man. I got you.”

It’s after midnight by the time I get inside my apartment, and I don’t bother with the lights. I sit on the couch in the dark with my phone in my hand, staring at the screen, waiting for a notification I know isn’t coming.

At some point, I pull up the tracking app on Lars. The red dot is at his apartment complex. He’s stagnant. He went home.

I should delete the app. Tracey would tell me to delete it. Hailey is going to tell me to delete it the next time she talks to me, if she ever does. The right answer is to be ahead of her on mending what I broke.

But… I don’t delete the app.

Instead, I tell myself it’s about her safety. At least that part’s even true.

Even if it isn’t the whole truth.

My phone dings at 1:47 a.m., and I lunge for it.

It’s an email. Not her.

FROM: [email protected]

TO: [email protected]

CC: [email protected]

Cole,

After receiving a disappointing email from your Interpersonal Boundaries Support Group therapist, you are being placed on indefinite unpaid leave, pending an internal investigation. HR has a call scheduled with Tracey Doyle to discuss your lack of participation in the program, and then we’ll be in touch.

At your earliest convenience, please stop by the office to surrender any and all company equipment.