Page 22 of Hate You to Love You

Claudia.

chapter nine

I’ve dried off from the pool, but a chill still spreads through me as I catch a glimpse of myself in the bathroom mirror. I look deflated, a complete wreck.

I make my way out to the terrace. Elliot stands off to the side, his arms crossed over his chest and his white button-up shirt still soaked to the point that I can see through it. There has to be some way to avoid him for the rest of this tour. Because at the rate things are going, we’ll reach a full-blown catastrophic apocalypse by day three.

Claudia has her back to me, sitting by the far end of the pool.

‘Don’t just stand there,’ Elliot whispers pointedly at me. ‘Go over to her.’

My eyes almost hurt from how far back I roll them at him. ‘Are you going to micromanage my every move?’

Elliot motions towards his soaked shirt. ‘You see this? This is why I need to micromanage you.’

And then a voice calls out sternly, ‘Are we going to get started? It’s not like I have all day.’

Claudia’s comment makes me tense up. I gulp as my chest tightens. This is it. My chance to make up for making a mess of things in front of her, and I’m not going to let Elliot ruin this for me. So I saunter towards her, trying to manifest faith and trust in myself. ‘It’s an honour to meet you,’ I say, holding out my hand for a handshake.

Claudia doesn’t return the gesture. She stares at me with a demanding gaze that commands attention. This doesn’t surprise me, considering that when it came to Claudia Leighton, all eyes were always on her. Or at least they were before she practically went into hiding.

Even though this is her house, she’s still dressed immaculately in a loose white blouse, striped light blue pants and a large golden belt that matches her gold hoop earrings to complete the outfit.

‘I’m so sorry about what happened earlier with the pool,’ I say as a peace offering.

Claudia lets out a dismayed exhale and turns her attention back to the ocean. ‘Do you want to know what my first thought was when we planned this tour?’

There’s a firmness in her tone that has me hesitant about saying the wrong thing. I nod my head.

‘I thought about all the things that people were going to say about my personal life. This tour would never be about the book. Nobody would care about my writing. They’d just ask questions about why I disappeared. About Alastair.’ Claudia pauses, turning to face me fully at last. ‘You see, Carlos, I don’t want this tour to be overshadowed by what people think they know about me. That’s why I need someone to help rewrite my story. This tour, and this book, is about me reclaiming the public image of myself that I’ve lost to years of rumour and speculation. So tell me, what makes you think you’re the right person for the job?’

If my heart was racing before, it’s almost at the finish line now.

‘I—’ I freeze. No words come to mind.

I couldn’t exactly be honest with Claudia about why I wanted – no, needed – this job. Sure, it was my last chance to prove that I still deserved to be a writer at Sparked. But I could also confess that I had been drowning, and this was my lifeline. Because deep down I wanted this job to work out so I could look at myself in the mirror again without feeling disappointed.

‘I won’t sit here and pretend to know what happened to you on that tour, or what went down between you and Alastair. I guess I know what that’s like, to feel lost and broken. Maybe that doesn’t mean much to you but I for one think that makes me understand why it’s so important for you to take control of your narrative again.’

For the first time since I’ve met her, Claudia gives me the hint of a smile.

‘Hmm,’ she murmurs. Despite the wind, her perfectly styled pixie cut doesn’t move at all. As a matter of fact, everything about Claudia’s stiff and rigid movements make her seem like a stone-sculpted goddess that should be on display at a museum.

We fall into another thick silence, only broken up by the sound of waves from the ocean in the distance. A flock of seagulls squawk above us. When Claudia doesn’t say anything, I take in a deep breath and ask my first question. ‘The love story in These Days was incredibly moving. What is it about loss and longing that you’re hoping to explore this time around?’

Claudia purses her lips, and her eyes quickly trace me, as if she’s studying my every move and decision. ‘I’d like to think of my books as more than just love stories,’ she says. I sense that I’ve struck a nerve. But before I can think of some way to smooth it over, she’s getting up from her chair, the metal scraping against the concrete. ‘If that’s all, I’ve got a personal matter to attend to.’

Claudia heads back inside the house. Her face might as well have said that I completely wasted her time.

I eyeball Elliot, who I notice is shaking his head at me. ‘That could have gone better,’ he observes. ‘Which is why I wanted you to run what you were going to bring up past me.’

I throw up my hands up in defeat. The only good thing about this situation is the fact that today’s interview is over.

‘We done here?’ I spit at him.

‘If we’re going to work together on this tour, you are going to have to be a bit more professional.’

I take a deep breath, willing myself to calm down before I say something snarky that I’ll regret. Once I feel a little in control again, I turn back in Elliot’s direction. ‘Fine. You want me to be professional? Don’t talk to me unless it’s about Claudia. In fact, don’t even try to look at me with that side eye of yours.’