Page 45 of Hate You to Love You

‘Yeah?’

‘Goodnight.’

‘Goodnight,’ I whisper back, so quiet I’m unsure if he can hear me.

chapter nineteen

then

Elliot’s sister had been back in Sydney for two months, and when he isn’t spending time helping her settle in, he’s at work. It’s the first time that we haven’t been able to see each other as often as we did when we first started hanging out.

Luckily, I’m keeping myself busy with my writing. A series of freelance book reviews and opinion pieces has meant that I’m finally receiving some interest in my writing. So, when I’m not doing a shift assisting photographers at Dusk, I’m writing.

The piece I’m most proud of is an article I’ve just got published in Sparked, titled ‘Remaking Our Way to Happiness: The remake and sequel epidemic that’s actually a cure for nostalgia’ about how our media’s obsession with remakes and sequels was actually a representation of our collective search for happiness through nostalgia.

The article did well enough that one of the editors continued sourcing written pieces from me on a freelance basis. After I took on a gig with them where I rated cafes in Sydney based on how comfortable their chairs were with a dash of humour, the team realised that I could write about enough topics that they offered me a full-time writing position.

‘We need to celebrate!’ Elliot says as he walks through the front door of The Terrace.

We’re gathered around the coffee table in the living room. Jones and Sal have just been arguing about whether we spend the evening playing Wingspan or Catan. Laney is on cheese board duty while Patrick is holding up the bottle of rosé to share, though I’m sure he’s desperately wishing he had a beer instead.

‘What’s going on?’ Jones asks.

Elliot holds his phone screen up to Jones’s face. I can see the ‘Meet the Team’ page on Sparked’s website at the top of the screen.

Jones squints at the title before he clocks my name beneath it and turns to grin at me. ‘Mate, this is huge! I always knew your writing would take you far.’

‘Someone find a way to print this so we can stick it up on the fridge!’ Sal adds. ‘I want to frame this moment.’

‘Our Carlos is a star,’ Laney cries, placing her hands against her cheeks and smiling with glee.

‘Cheers to you,’ Patrick says, although his attention is still firmly on the bottle of rosé in his hand.

I lean in towards him. ‘Thank you. By the way, there’s a sixpack of Stone & Wood in the fridge.’

Patrick leaps from the floor and rushes into the kitchen.

‘Which brings me back to my earlier point,’ Elliot says. ‘We’ve got to celebrate.’

I reach for a slice of cheese. ‘We don’t need to do that.’

‘But this is your dream, Carlos!’ He reaches out to take his phone back and holds it up above his head. ‘You should be proud yourself. I’m proud of you.’

My face goes red.

‘Don’t sell yourself short,’ Jones adds.

Elliot looks at me admiringly. ‘Has Carlos ever told you guys about his writing process?’

The hot flush lingers across my cheeks as everyone turns to face me.

‘Tell them about the feeling,’ Elliot adds, nodding towards me, his voice joyful.

‘What’s “the feeling”?’ Sal asks. ‘Sounds mystical.’

I shrug, directing my focus to the ground as I do my best to explain the feeling that makes me love writing so much. ‘Whenever I watch a movie or read a book, the one thing that always stays with me is how it makes me feel. Sometimes a character will make me feel less alone, or a story will show me that everything will be okay in the end. If my words can do the same for someone else, then I feel like I’ve been pretty successful.’

I pause for a moment, catching Elliot staring at me with pride.