Page 89 of Hate You to Love You

Addie walks towards me and leans up against my desk. ‘I’m so proud of you.’

I beam with a confident smile. ‘Thanks. And thank you for everything.’

‘Look at you getting all sentimental,’ she teases.

‘I’m serious. I barely knew which way was up after losing Dad. You’ve been more than a good friend to me since then. I know I haven’t always been the same kind of friend to you.’

Addie steps closer towards me, playfully nudging her knee against mine. ‘Don’t be so hard on yourself, silly. That’s what friendship is: showing up for each other.’

‘Well, I promise to be there for you, and Maria.’

‘See,’ Addie says. ‘Look at that smile on your face. This is what happens when you remember not to dwell on all the bad. Don’t forget there is still so much good out there.’

The weight of her words lands softly on my heart.

I’m about to pull her in for a hug when my phone starts ringing – an unknown number. Maybe it’s someone at Redhouse? I pick up the call.

‘Quite an interesting article.’ I grin at the sound of Claudia’s voice.

‘I know it’s different to what everyone expected at the outset,’ I say. ‘But I hope you’re not disappointed?’

I hear her take a deep breath. ‘It most certainly isn’t what I expected, but despite that, it tells me I was right to trust you with my story.’

‘Thank you,’ I exhale with relief.

‘There’s just one more thing,’ she says. ‘Why did you let Elliot stay in London?’

‘How did you know about that?’

She laughs on the other end of the line. ‘Elliot called me to do a campaign wrap-up. He mentioned you two couldn’t make it work when I asked him about you.’

I frown, puzzled. ‘Wait. How did you know about—’

‘You and Elliot?’ she cuts in, boasting with confidence. ‘When I first asked Redhouse to submit a selection of writers who’d be up for the job, he told me about you. He showed me the piece you’d written about Summer Memory. The way you wrote about falling in love… well, I could tell you really understood the connection I had with Stephen, and what I was trying to do with that book. And once I heard Elliot talk about you, and how deeply he regretted losing you, and not telling you how he really felt… I had a feeling you’d understand why I needed to do the things I did, and I was right.’ She sighs wistfully. ‘Plus, I hoped that it might bring you two back together. Perhaps wanting you and Elliot back together was my way of turning all my regret about Stephen into something good.’

I tilt my head, holding the phone close to my ear as I scan my desk for something to ground me. ‘I don’t know what to say.’

‘Say that you won’t give up if you get the chance. I told you the truth about my story, I don’t want it to be for nothing. I hope you can learn something from it.’

I’m too baffled to answer.

‘Carlos?’ Claudia says.

‘Yes?’

‘Goodbye. And thank you.’

‘Goodbye, Claudia.’

Before I can begin to process everything Claudia has just revealed about Elliot, my phone buzzes again.

Jones 2.04pm: Can we meet? We need to talk.

Tamara is too distracted by the all the social media hype to even notice me leaving the office. I rush through the streets of Surry Hills towards Darlinghurst. Pigeons flutter towards the sky as I cut through the small park and cross the intersection to the bakery. As I near the entrance, I spot Jones, Sal and Laney sitting inside. My stomach is in knots.

Unease takes over my body. The voice in my head tells me I’ve hurt them too much, just like I’ve hurt my mum and Elliot. They’d be better off if you just left, the voice says. I look back at the street, debating returning to the office.

‘Where do you think you’re going?’ I hear someone call.