Page 17 of Untroubled Heart

Her cheeks immediately flush as she turns back to her dough. “Umm, whenDaisywasconceived,” she mumbles, the sentence stringing together as one word.

“What?” I shriek.

“Well,” she gasps, floundering for an excuse. “I’ve been busy.”

“But you don’t even remember that time!”

“Ohh, please don’t ask me when it was before then.”

“It’s been a year for me,” I admit in commiseration. I used to love sex. The longer I go without, the more I worry that I’ll lose that confidence I once had. Especially when the next time it happens, it’ll be with an entirely new body I haven’t yet explored… not with anyone else.

“Do you miss it?” I ask.

“I don’t think I even remember how to do it,” she says, dejected, but for some reason, it makes laughter slowly rise in my chest. Before long, we’re both cackling, with tears streaming down our faces.

“I’m thirty,” she whines, still laughing. “I completely missed my twenties when sex was meant to be wild and daring.”

I wipe the last of my happy tears away. “Well, I’m twenty-three, and I can tell you the last time I saw action, it was the opposite of wild and daring.” It was tipsy hate sex with my ex that left me knocked up, and while I’d never, ever regret my daughter and how she came to be here, it sucks that it’s my last memory of it. It wasn’t something fuelled by love and tenderness. It wasn’t even with someone who respected me. Those days had long passed between Derek and me.

“What do you think makes amazing sex?” I muse.

“You’re assuming, of course, that I’ve had it?”

“Naturally.”

Her hands move absently through the dough. “I think you’ll feel it everywhere. It’ll make your toes curl with pleasure, your stomach flip with excitement, and your heart beat with completion. I think it comes with a partner who can read your body, but is also hungry for you. Their desire for you translates through every kiss and every touch. It fuses with your bones.”

“Wow, celibacy feels even more depressing now.”

“You’re telling me.” She huffs.

I tilt my head, studying my friend as a thought occurs. “This may be totally outrageous, but have we considered that maybe the hot cop is—”

“I never said he was hot,” Liv interrupts with a shake of her head.

“Was he?”

“I mean, he wasn’t unattractive. He was definitely older, but he certainly kept himself in shape.”

“You have to admit the cop thing in itself is pretty hot. Bet he knows his way around handcuffs.” I bounce my eyebrows at her. “But, seriously, is it possible that he could be…”

“No.” Liv shakes her head in disbelief, but her eyes betray her curiosity. “Surely if we’d slept together, he would have alluded to the fact.”

“Yeah, but you said you didn’t remember him. He was probably embarrassed… and confused, since he thought you were dead.”

Liv clicks her tongue, fingers drumming against the benchtop. “You know, the more I think about it, the angrier I get. I have questions, goddammit.” Liv smacks a fist down. “Who is he to disappear and just leave me wondering? I’ve done enough of that in the last four years.”

“I agree. But you have no concrete leads on how to find this guy.”

“My mum still has a lot of my stuff in storage from my old apartment and bakery in Queens Coast. Maybe I missed something, like a business card?”

“It’s worth a shot.”

She nods, solidifying the idea in her mind as she picks up a knife and starts cutting into the pastry.

“Going back to your fantastic sex question—technically speaking, it doesn’t hurt if they know how to work a clit, too.”

I laugh. “Did you remember that while thinking about your hot cop?”