Page 182 of The Silent Appeal

She’s moved out of her Hayward Heights flat to a bedsit on the Grange estate.

11:42 a.m. Carol wrote:

Why on earth has she done that? Did she lose her job at Sainsbury’s?

11:45 a.m. Kevin wrote:

No, she’s friends with Amelia, Lucas, and Georgia (who’s up the duff). She’s “swapped” with them, while they look for somewhere bigger of their own.

11:50 a.m. Carol wrote:

Well, I sympathize with the Stibsons, having had Nicky-Rose haunting my spare room since January. One doesn’t appreciate how valuable one’s own space is until someone else moves into it.

To: Rev. Joshua Harries

From: Fran Elroy-Jones

Date: May 31, 2025

Subject: So down

Dear Josh,

I don’t know how much longer I can go on like this. There’s no light or air and I can practically stand in the middle of the flat and touch everything in it.

Popped round to my place last night and Georgia was lying on my sofa, Lucas’s guitars and Amelia’s clothes were all over the place, and the kitchen was a filthy mess. Every time I go over it feels less and less like mine. They’ve got an irritating habit of asking me to bring them groceries from work and I never see any money in return. They think “staff discount” means “free.”

Amelia is walking much better, but she’s in more pain than she lets on. She wants the doctor to prescribe stronger analgesics for play week. I think Lucas is suffering from delayed shock. He was holding it together for Amelia, and now she’s recovering he’s feeling worse. Yet there’s no doubt they’re happier than they were in the studio flat, so that makes me feel better. You know why I’ve done this, don’t you? If I sacrifice something that means the world to me—my home—I hope it makes up for the hurt I’m causing by allowing you and me to continue. It might not make sense to anyone else, but it does to me.

Now we can’t meet as often at my place, those few stolen moments during rehearsals are even more precious. Luckily, we have rehearsals tomorrow, Monday, and Wednesday. Then it’s the play nights. That’s three tea breaks and I’m sure we can meet up in the lane after the show too. When are you and Elizabeth coming to see the play? All my love, Fran xxx

Undated page from a decorative journal belonging to Isabel Beck:

TODAY PLAY WEEK

YIPPEEE! Play week starts tomorrow! Gerda and I are going to “knock ’em dead” all week. Not my words, Kevin’s when I came offstage after last week’s rehearsal and I’ve been walking on air ever since. Of course, I’m very nervous, too, although according to the AI mindfulness app Sarah-Jane is always recommending, I should see nerves as a message from the universe that I care about something and that we should accept the feelings with calm detachment. EEEEEEEK!!!! Fran used to say that if you feel nervous before an important event you should tell yourself it’s really excitement that will make your performance better, which tricks you into seeing it as a positive thing.

I keep telling myself Gerda isn’t the biggest part I’ve ever had with the most words and actions (but I don’t believe myself for one second, because it IS).

It’s Big Sunday tomorrow and Emma is bringing in the sculptures that are meant to be made by Henrietta (Amelia) to depict Gerda (me) who is married to the man she loves (Nick). I really hope Emma has noticed the six pounds I’ve lost over the last couple of months and that I’ve had my hair cut to look (a bit) like Nicky-Rose’s—although hers is much longer and glossier than mine. It’s the same basic shape. I keep telling myself I’m excited to see the statues, but really I’m super nervous.

I’m meeting Nicky-Rose at Squires before rehearsal on Monday and trying not to think it might be the last time. It’s the last Monday rehearsal, boo, so might suggest we meet on Wednesday as well, before dress rehearsal. Now we’re friends, surely we’ll meet regularly, even when there’s no rehearsal? Nicky-Rose says there’s something really important she’d like me to do for her this week, but that she won’t tell me till nearer the time. I asked if it was to do with the play and she said no, so I’m very excited about that (actually excited this time!).

I’m at work now, but swapped on to earlies for next week so I can get ready in time for the play. It means getting up at 6 a.m., boo, and traveling on the bus during rush hour, double boo, but it’ll be worth it to get to the hall early every night.

P.S. I didn’t mention Fran once during this journal entry! Except now I’ve mentioned her in the P.S. I can say she’s looking tired and stressed—which means Lady Angkatell is looking tired and stressed too. Nicky-Rose says Kevin is disappointed with her performance and hopes she pulls it out of the bag on the nights. We had a giggle together about her fling with the vicar!

Messages posted to Fran’s Hollow Play WhatsApp group on May 31, 2025:

2:17 p.m. Fran wrote:

Any chance of you guys making your own way to Big Sunday tomorrow? I’ll be at church in the morning and picking you up will mean driving all the way back.

2:20 p.m. Amelia wrote:

Oh. Lucas is hosting a friend’s thirtieth birthday party at Lunar tonight. He’ll be having a few drinks and might not be safe to drive, even tomorrow morning.

2:29 p.m. Lucas wrote: