Page 55 of The Princess and the SEAL

Chapter 24

Ryan

SHE LOVED ME? SHE LOVED ME?

No one had ever told me that they loved me. Ever. Not my mom. My foster parents. Anyone.

Did she mean it? I doubted it.

Fuck, I loved her, too.

But she was promised to another guy. And I had been dumb enough to tell her how I felt too. Now it would be even more painful when she left me.

I went to the bathroom and threw out the condom before quickly returning to her side.

One look at the blood-stained sheets and pride swelled in my chest.

She was mine. She had only ever been mine, no one else’s.

No one had ever been mine, just mine, and I had never been anyone’s. My mom cared more about getting her fix than taking care of me.

Why was I being such a pussy? Giselle didn’t love Miguel. She loved me.

If I let her fly back home without asking her to stay, I’d regret it for the rest of my life.

And like she said, I didn’t live my life with regrets.

She rolled out of the sheets, and I stared at her naked body. I wanted to wake up with her every day. She came back to bed a few minutes later.

I hugged her. “Babe, can we talk?”

“Of course.”

An empty feeling coiled in the pit of my stomach. “I know I don’t have much, but I don’t want you to go home. Stay here. With me. I’ll take care of you.”

She turned away from me. “Don’t, Ryan. Don’t ask me that. You know I can’t.”

I turned her back to me. “Why? Why can’t you? I can make you happy. You love me, for fuck sakes. I love you. You just lost your virginity to me. Doesn’t that mean anything to you?”

“Yes, of course, it does. It means everything to me. You mean everything to me. But I can’t move here. I have a duty to my country. To my subjects. What if I asked you to leave the SEALs?”

“That’s different. I can’t. I’m under a contract.”

“No, it’s not different—it’s the same thing. The exact same thing. You have responsibilities to your country, and so do I.”

I knew she was right, but I couldn’t help but think there was a way we could make this work.

“Well, what if you just don’t marry Miguel? Things could change. I don’t always have to be a SEAL.” Once I said that I realized how far gone I was with this girl to even consider giving up my career for her…

Being a SEAL was all I ever had, all I ever wanted to be. If I took that away, I had nothing.

“Ryan, I will marry Miguel. The date is set. We have sent the invitations. The palace has spent so much money on the wedding. I have to marry him.”

My helplessness turned to rage. “Then why did you tell me you love me? And sleep with me?”

She placed her arms around me, and I rested my head on her chest. “Because I do love you. And I am happy that you are the first man I have ever slept with. It was everything I imagined and more. You will always be in my heart, Ryan. It doesn’t matter how much I want to be with you . . . I can’t.”

She was right. We were star-crossed lovers. But no matter how much my head understood, I couldn’t explain it to my heart.