Page 54 of Dear Future Ex-wife


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If I had a crown made from pearls, shells, and coral, I would look the part of a sea queen. Which reminds me… Nate is supposed to handle my jewels for the wedding—a pearl necklace, earrings, and matching tiara. They’re his gifts to me, aside from his “huge” package he promised to let me open. And I have to pick up the Bulgari rose gold watch Nate requested.

He’s still getting the bottle of lube for shits and giggles. Because, why not? You never know when you might need it.

I twirl a few times and smile in the mirror as the train fans out around my ankles. A bit of cleavage spills out from the top that scoops low without making me feel too exposed. Nate will love it, no doubt.

My stomach fills with butterflies, a mixture of giddy anticipation and nerves. Weeks ago, I accepted Nate’s proposal, unsure if he would follow through on his promises. I raise my hand to stare at the ring. Heat rushes to my cheeks as I recall his proposal in the jewelry store. I wanted him to set aside his pride, and he did. I wanted a replica of Princess Diana’s ring, and he found a close second.

Maybe, after all this time, Nate is the one. What if we were supposed to walk down the aisle together all along? It feels too much like a childhood fantasy, something I wished for a decade ago. This feels too good to be true, something I can lose in a heartbeat.

I spin around to face Dante. “Thanks for doing this on short notice. You’re a serious lifesaver.”

He extends his hand to help me down from the platform, and I slip my fingers between his. “My pleasure. I’m a big fan of The Last Empire video games. When Lola told me you’re Jonathan McQueen’s daughter, I damn near had a stroke.”

I hadn’t pegged him as a fanboy. Most people know the names of the games, not so much the founders of the company. With all of the gossip splashed across the internet because of Nate, I guess it’s hard not to know our names. And if this wedding doesn’t go according to plan, the world will know us for an entirely different reason. We could end up like the real-life version of the family from Schitt’s Creek.

The King and Queen dethroned.

I cock my head at Lola. “Why didn’t you tell me Dante was a fan? I would’ve brought some merch with me.”

“Not necessary.” Dante waves his hand. “Every news outlet in the country will have your face plastered in their papers with my dress on your body.”

Amelia shoves her fingers into her mouth and whistles. “Looking hot, babe. You look like Ariel in the flesh.”

“Tail included,” Jules jokes with laughter in her tone. “Will you turn into a human girl after the ceremony?”

I throw my head back and laugh.

Dante excuses himself to take a phone call, giving me some alone time with my bridesmaids. The girls have been with me every step of the way, real troopers about this sham wedding. I couldn’t ask for better friends to come along with me on this journey. After years of living in Los Angeles, I was afraid I would come back to Philly with my head tucked between my legs, praying everyone would forgive me for staying away for so long. But I lucked out with everyone welcoming me back with open arms.

Callie hugs me from behind, her flowery perfume fills my nostrils. “You’re losing the bet, woman. Mark my words. Nate’s going to pop a major boner in the middle of the ceremony and caveman drag you down the aisle over his shoulder to his bed.”

I shake my head. “Nate won’t know how to get me out of this thing.”

Callie snorts in my ear. “You little vixen. I know you will give into his fine ass on your wedding night.”

“All of you bet on me to lose,” I point out. “So, how does anyone actually win said bet?”

“Meh! Don’t kill the vibe.” Callie rolls her shoulders, unaffected. “Anyway, it’s all in good fun. If you guys hookup, high-five for you, but if you don’t, at least I’ll have one of the groomsmen to bone. Sex on the beach isn’t just the name of a drink when I’m in the Bahamas.”

Callie is so crude that sometimes I wonder how we became friends. Where I’m shy and reserved, she’s outgoing and wild. Her sexual appetite is on par with Nate and his manwhore brother.

“I have dibs on them, too,” Lola reminds her. “We have the best man bet.”

“We don’t have many options,” Callie shoots back, raising her hand in the air to tick off the available men in the bridal party. “Jules has dibs on Reid.”

“No, I don’t,” Jules shouts without hesitation, her cheeks flushed. “I’ll take anyone but Reid.”

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