Page 91 of Her Reluctant Highlander Husband

When he’d left the Campbell laird with only a reluctant agreement to aid in the takeover of the McCurdys, he knew he couldn’t risk losing Dorien’s promise of men. But as he headed toward Dunardry, thinking of his future, he realized it looked rather bleak and lonely.

He’d embraced the loneliness before, encouraged it even, as a penance. But now that he knew the truth—felt it in his soul—he realized he’d paid enough. Maggie had loved him, even as she lay dying. She wouldn’t want him to spend the rest of his life in this misery with nothing but rage in his heart. She would have thought him a coward for keeping himself safely hidden away from any chance of further pain.

Before he knew what he was doing, he’d changed course to end up in Durham, England. And was now standing here before the woman he had given up. The woman who had made him feel something good for the first time in years.

He was most likely too late to stop the annulment from going through. But as long as she wasn’t promised to another, there was a chance she might marry him again. This time in a pretty dress like the one she was wearing now. With shoes, and her own strong voice declaring she would love him until death parted them. He closed his eyes, sending up a silent prayer that death wouldn’t part them for a very long time.

“I believe we should speak on the matter alone,” her father said. “In the morning. It’s too late to discuss such things tonight. You may stay in one of the guest rooms.” Dorien’s eyes flared as if waiting for Bryce to make a complaint regarding the sleeping arrangements.

As much as he wanted to hold Dorie and even pull her under him so he could make love to her, he would respect the man’s home, in the hope Dorien would take Bryce’s suit seriously.

Dorie said nothing, and it reminded him of when he’d first met her and the way they’d communicated on another level. As then, he could almost hear her thoughts as she watched him with wide eyes. He frowned when he noticed the dark circles under them. His wife wasn’t sleeping well, and he hated to think it was his doing. Was she unhappy here? He couldn’t imagine her not wanting to live here, from the look of the house and her new clothes.

He was shown to his room immediately and after removing his kilt and boots, he lay in the most elaborate bed he’d ever seen. He couldn’t sleep. What was he thinking? He’d come all this way to try to get her back when he had nothing to offer her. Bloody hell. He should have brought the dog. At least then he might have had a chance.

He didn’t even have a way to take Dorie home. He’d not be able to afford a luxurious carriage like the one she’d ridden in when she’d left Dunardry. He’d need to buy a horse for her.

He cast that idea aside. She wouldn’t be able to bring all her nice things with her on a horse. She was a viscount’s daughter. She had things now. Nice things. Like a fancy brush and comb set.

The reminder made his stomach flip with unease. What if she was glad to be rid of him? What if she didn’t want him? He’d state his case. Beg for her forgiveness and hope she could see past his stupidity. And if that didn’t work, he’d leave her to her life here and not bother her again.

Och. Why did he come? Surely she didn’t want him after the way he’d treated her. He would rest a while and sneak off before morning so as not to embarrass himself.

He turned again and heard the door open. With the moonlight coming in through the window, he watched as Dorie stepped inside, her hair glowing blue in the dim light.

“Are you awake?” she whispered.

Rather than speak, he got up and went to her. He wanted to reach for her, but she stepped back, crossing her arms over her chest, blocking the view of her breasts through the thin gown. He had no right to touch her. She was no longer his.

He stayed a short distance away, watching and waiting to hear why she’d come to him in the middle of the night.

When she said nothing, he grew restless. “Do ye love someone else, Dorie? I wouldn’t blame you. Have you found another?” If she had given her heart to someone, he could be on his way immediately.

“Why are you here?” she asked, ignoring his questions. Hers were more important, and yet he didn’t know how to answer. Or rather, where to start.

He took a breath and told her everything, ending with the words she needed to hear. “I left the Campbell lands planning to go back to Dunardry, but I could only think of you and how much I miss you and want you. That’s how I ended up on your doorstep this evening with nothing save my horse and a few pieces of clothing.”

“You signed the annulment?” she whispered when he was done.

He winced, knowing how she must feel about it. “I did. At the time, all I could think was how much I wanted all the pain to go away. I just wanted to be alone in my sorrow. But I ken now it was a mistake. I need you, Dorie. I want you with me.”

She hadn’t moved closer, and he worried it was too late. He’d let her go, so of course someone would have snatched her up. She was beautiful and loving and all the things a man would want in a wife.

“I’ll never be able to replace Maggie,” she said. “I’m not her, and I canna live my life in her shadow. I love you, Bryce, as much as I’d tried not to. But I canna heal you. Not when ye don’t want to be healed. Not when you canna let me into your heart.”

He clenched his fists at his side to keep from reaching for her, pulling her to him. If he ever held her again, it would have to be because he deserved her. Which meant he had to make her see how he felt now. He had to be honest. With her. With himself.

“I’ve been a bastard to you all this time. I took the parts I could manage and rejected the ones I couldn’t, and it wasn’t fair to you. I didn’t mean for you to feel less than Maggie, but I see now I left you no choice but to feel that way. I’m sorry, Dorie. So sorry. I’d like to have a life with you. A family.”

She took one step closer. That small move made his chest tighten with hope.

“You loved her. And I never expected you to love me the same way. People are different, I understand that. Since I’ve been here in Durham, I’ve witnessed it by seeing my father with Harriet. Love exists in different forms. I know that you love me, Bryce. Not the way you loved Maggie, but the way you’re meant to love me.”

He nodded, happy she’d found a way to explain the way he felt better than he ever could. “Aye. I do love you. Do ye think you could want a man who took too long figuring things out? If he only wants to spend the rest of his life loving you and making you happy?”

She laughed and her hand came up to rest on his chest. The same place where he felt his heart thumping with anticipation.

He rested his forehead against hers and looked her in the eye. “If you could give me another chance, I promise you won’t regret it. I’ll see to it you know how special you are every day, for as long as we live.”