Page 137 of The New Place

How fucking weird.

He feels better up here, though. And better since last night, still.

Ned looks at their hands laced together, and touches Abbot’s bare third finger. “Pat got rings.”

“He did?”

“He’s way too excited about this. I’m sure they’re the wrong size.” Though Ned’s probably isn’t. Pat likely sent Ned’s mom up to his room to check his ring size. Did she see the watches in his desk drawer? Was he supposed to wear his? Will Charles notice he didn’t?

Ned opens his mouth to ask, then closes it. They have to talk about the money thing.

Not now, though. It can wait a couple days. And then Ned will…he’ll…

He’ll do something he’ll figure out later, because right now he’s getting married and panicking both, and that’s enough to keep him plenty busy.

“I’m sure the rings will be fine,” Abbot says.

“You don’t have to wear it,” Ned says.

“Are you going to?”

Ned looks down at his hands. Will he? Peggy asked about it in the car, so she’s clearly expecting it. It’s probably easier to leave it on after the ceremony. Fewer questions from her, and the last thing he needs is anyone picking apart this front.

Though it’s not a front. It’s a real, legal marriage, and the rings are a symbol of that. “Guess so.”

“I will too, then.”

“Great,” Ned says, and that’s that. They’re wearing rings, simple as that. They’re getting married.

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” Ned says automatically. Is he? No, not really. He’s reeling and very carefully not thinking that his parents’ house won’t be available to him for as long as he was counting on.

The only thing left in his head is a tremor of nerves. He’s been nervous all day, he realizes. Of course he is. He’s fucking getting married.

But getting married to Abbot.

When Ned slips off the arm of the couch to sit beside him, Abbot leans close. “I’m okay, I think,” Ned says. “You?”

“Fine.”

“But really?”

Abbot’s silent for a beat too long and Ned’s stomach pitches. But then, softly, he says, “This is not perhaps how I thought this day would go.”

“Yeah, I think I’m kind of freaking out.”

“Do you want to not do this?”

“No, I do want to.”

“Ned—”

“I absolutely do. Because…” Because this isn’t how he envisioned his wedding day—his second wedding day—but to be here with this man? He does feel better now, sitting together. He takes Abbot’s hand in his, resting them both on his thigh. Everything has always felt better with Abbot beside him. “Because we’re good together, you and I. We’ll figure life out, and isn’t that what marriage is? Just a blind leap that we’ll be in this together?”

“I think we have some proof it’s not simply blind.”

“A confidence interval?”