Page 60 of Anarchy Chained: Alpha Thomas

CHAPTER SIXTEEN - SADIE

I lean against Sullivan and sigh. What a crazy week it’s been.

But then I realize I have nothing to compare it to. Maybe all my weeks are crazy?

He leans forward and puts his arm around me. “Stop thinking about it and just rest.”

“What if I wake up and you’re gone?”

A soft laugh at that comment from Sullivan. “Are you falling in love with me, Sadie? Got a little Stockholm Syndrome going?”

I smile. But then frown. “You didn’t kidnap me. I mean, Thomas didn’t kidnap me. God, this is very confusing. I just feel like I know you better. That’s all. And I’ve been through enough change for a whole lifetime these past few days. I could use a little more of the same.”

“I get it,” he says, rubbing my shoulder.

“But you didn’t answer me. If I close my eyes and rest… will you still be here when I wake up?”

A shrug is all I get for an answer. He has nothing.

“Can you try?” I ask, unwilling to give up. “Just try? What if Thomas comes back and he’s confused? Or… thinks I crashed the train on purpose? What if…”

“Stop it,” Sullivan says. “I can’t control it. Not really. When he sleeps he’s weak because of all the drugs, maybe. And I think the crash had something to do with me returning. Or maybe it’s the dark. At any rate, we can’t control that. Let’s focus on what we can control. Healing. Let’s focus on healing. And the best way to do that is sleep.”

I let out a long breath of air and try to let it go. We really are stuck. Until someone comes bursting through that gate or ambushes us from behind, we’re just stuck.

So I close my eyes and will myself to let it go. I enjoy his warm body, at least. We’re pressed up against each other. It’s freezing down here. We could use that emergency kit. We’d have options. But that’s dumb too. If we didn’t crash we’d already be in the west tower. Safe and sound.

Eventually Sullivan relaxes and his breathing becomes softer. Slower. His head is against mine. And I’m pretty sure he’s asleep.

How long will he sleep? Which one of them will wake up? Who is coming for me?

Who? I ask my head. Who are you?

Electricity shoots through my brain, making me gasp for air and press my hands up to my temples.

Sadie, Sadie, Sadie, flashes across my closed eyelids like a neon sign. Where are you? I’m coming. I won’t let you die down there.

Who are you? I ask the message in my head. I don’t know who you are.

Nothing. No answer. No static. No flashing words. Just nothing.

I’m here, I mentally whisper back. I’m in the tunnel near the west gate. I’m stuck. I can’t get out. I’m stuck.

It’s probably a huge mistake to tell them this. But if we’re fucked, and we clearly are, then why not just get it over with? Face it, deal with it, and then—figure out a way to fight them. Right now, we don’t even know who they are. What their weaknesses are. We need to see them to know those things.

We’re friends, my vision overlay suddenly messages. We’re friends and we’re coming to get you out of there. Just hold tight.

“Yes,” I whisper. Thomas’s friends are coming. I debate waking up Sullivan and telling him about the message. But then… he might fight them. He might think they’re here to put him back in the dark. And I get it. I get him. He wants his control back. I don’t want to be put to sleep, either. And I’m probably not even the primary personality.

But fuck that. I want my life back even if it means whoever I stole this body from gets locked up in the dark instead.

I don’t want Sullivan to go away, I decide. I don’t want Thomas to go away either. But if I have to make a choice…

Well, I don’t. It’s not my choice to make. I just don’t want to lose Sullivan. Not yet.

I like him. And when these partners of his get here I’m sure they’ll have some remedy—some weird fucking drug they can give Sullivan to get Thomas back.

So I let him sleep. I enjoy him just a little bit longer.