Page 1 of Alonzo

CHAPTER ONE - ALONZO

“Fort Collins Public Library, how can I help you?”

“Yes. Hello. I have a question about a book.”

“Yes, sir. That’s wonderful. I can’t wait to hear it.”

“Well, it’s not a question about a book, per se. I’m looking for something specific. To read.”

“Well, you’re talking to the right girl. I’m a book expert. I even have the pencil skirt, tight white blouse, severe ponytail, and dark-framed glasses to prove it.”

“Hmmm. What’s your name? It’s just… I like to use a woman’s name when I talk books with them.”

“Ohhh… Tara. I’m Tara. Do you… like women who talk books back to use your name as well?”

“Hmmm. Intriguing question, Tara. I’ve never thought about it before. But yes. Yes. I’d like that. I’m Lonnie. A too-smart, button-down-shirt-wearing accountant who loves numbers and making things… balance.”

“Balancing. I like that.”

“You do?”

“Mmm-hmmm.”

“What kind of balancing are you picturing? Like… financial statements and checkbooks?”

“Nnn-nooooo. More like… the kind of balance you need when a hot, sexy accountant is fucking you up against a wall.”

“Oh.”

“Sorry. My imagination is… well, wild. And I’m a bit bored at the moment. There’s absolutely no one else here in the library with me. I guess I’m just looking for a little fun while no one’s watching.”

“Are you sure you’re a librarian?”

“Positive. But I’d like to clarify one thing before we continue. I don’t mind people watching.”

“Oh.”

“Now tell me. What kind of specific book are you looking for? I’m excited at the prospect of pleasing you.”

“This might sound a little weird, Tara.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that. I’ve heard it all, Lonnie.”

“It’s a very… odd trope I’m looking for.”

“Trust me, Lonnie. I’m here to help. What trope are you looking for today?”

“OK, so… it’s the one about the… well, let’s call him under-socialized—”

“Got it. Our protagonist is a man who is maybe… an accountant?”

“Exactly.”

“Great. Keep going.”

“And he meets this… other under-socialized person. Female. Maybe a…”

“A librarian?”