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“But…I found that girl. You were with her. She said you two were together.”
“She lied,” I spit back, defensive. “I didn’t even know her name until after the whole thing blew up in my face.”
“You don’t have to know a girl’s name before you have sex with her.” Her words sound painful on the tip of her tongue. “I’m sure you’ve done it plenty of times.”
“Look, I’m not going to lie to you and say that I haven’t been with a lot of girls because I have had more than my share. But I did not have sex with the girl you found in my bed. I promise. Ask Clay or Finch. They will both tell you the truth.”
“They are your friends. The two of them would kill for you. There’s no telling what most of the people on campus would do just to cover for their golden boy.”
“Hey,” I say, stroking her cheek, “I am telling you the truth whether you want to hear it or not. I know how things must have looked to you. If I were you, I would’ve thought the same thing. But you have to believe me when I say that I never cheated on you.”
“Walk me through that night then. Tell me everything that happened.”
“Most of it is a blur. I was drunk. So were you. We all were. That night was crazy.”
“Bash,” she says against my hand. “Please. Humor me. Tell me everything that happened in the exact order you remember. I need to hear it. If you do this for me, I will try to let it go so that we can move on. I would like to believe that we had something.”
“We still have something,” I tell her. “I know you feel it, too.”
“I know. That’s why I need to hear it. Just this once, and we can forget about it.”
I let out a sigh of relief. For years, I have wanted to tell Tori everything about that night. She never gave me a chance.
Moving my hand from her face, I slide my palm down her back, guiding her toward the table. “Sit down. This might be a long story.”
She does as I instruct, and I sit next to her, scooting my chair along the tile, so I can hold her hand as I tell her everything I can recall from that night.
“The team had just made the playoffs. I’d broken my record for rushing yards and was on a high like you would not believe.”
Tori smiles. She was always proud of my accomplishments, even though she didn’t understand much about football. She squeezes my hand as if telling me to keep going.
“We had that big party at the house to celebrate after the game. I’d never seen the house so packed. It was like a frat party on steroids. You were hanging out wit
h your friends, dancing in the living room, and I was doing shots with Clay and Finch in the kitchen. We drank about half a bottle of tequila before I stumbled back into the living room to look for you. I couldn’t find you or any of your friends. I called and texted you a few times, but you didn’t answer me. The music in the house was so loud. There were people screaming in my ear when I tried to leave you a slurred voicemail that made no sense.”
I take a second to compose myself before continuing with the last half of the story. This part gets complicated. So much of that night plays in my head like movie clips, though none of it vivid enough to piece together.
“I looked through most of the rooms on the first floor of the house and found nothing but drunken idiots, who were trying to get me to drink more with them. When I couldn’t find you anywhere, I had given up and decided to check my bedroom. I’d just assumed you went back to your dorm. It was well after three in the morning, and I couldn’t see ten feet in front of me to go after you. The lights were dim when I walked into my room, just a single lamp in the corner turned on low, but it was still hard for me to see. I saw blonde hair fanned out on my pillow and a girl who I had thought was you wrapped in my blankets. She had her back turned to me so that I couldn’t see her face. It was dark, and I was drunk.”
Tori wipes the corner of her eye, causing me to stop long enough to comfort her before I finish dredging up some of the worst memories of our lives. But this conversation needs to happen. Because it should have happened years ago.
“I stripped down to my boxers, hopped into bed with the girl, and ran my hands down her arms and legs, but only because I thought she was you. When I leaned down to kiss her neck, she rolled onto her back before I could touch her and smiled up at me. I was in shock, paralyzed by the fear of you finding me with her. By the time I tried to get away from her and throw her out, you had burst into my bedroom. How could I explain what had happened? I thought she was you. We never kissed. We never had sex. I felt guilty about touching her at all, but again, I had no idea she wasn’t you. It was all a misunderstanding.”
“But girls always sneak into your room. They knew that was okay because you’d allowed them. Or at least that was what I’d heard around campus after the rumors started.”
I shake my head. “No, that was the first time a girl had climbed into my bed. Now, they do it all the time just to see if I will let them stay. Do you know how many girls I have had to throw out of my bed every week?”
She rolls her eyes at me in disapproval. “Am I supposed to feel sorry for you, Bash?” The corner of her lip curls into an angry scowl. “Because I don’t. That’s just disgusting.”
“I’m not saying this to get on your nerves just stating a fact.”
“Well, you managed to do both,” she deadpans, crossing her arms over her chest.
“C’mon, Tori. Don’t be like that. You wanted to hear the truth, and you got it. I’m not going to pretend that I’m a saint, but I sure as hell didn’t do anything with that girl. It took me a while to figure out who she was and what she was doing in my bed.”
“Was she a cheerleader from another school?”
“Yes.” I let out a puff of air, frustrated. “One of the guys on the other team set me up. He wanted to get to me. And he did. Earlier in the season, the same guy broke Clay’s arm with a bullshit sack, and even with Clay out of the game, we still made it into the playoffs. That asshole wanted to hurt the team and me, and in the process, he also hurt you. The plan had worked, because we lost to their team that year. Not having you in the stands to cheer for me and with all the drama that had gone on around campus had sucked the life out of my game.”
