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“I’m Cal.” The vampire grinned and slipped his arm from around my waist to extend his hand to Paul. I noticed that he didn’t drop his fangs … and he had adopted a softer version of our bluegrass drawl. His body language had relaxed, and he seemed to be intentionally moving at a slow, almost jerky pace. He was playing human bumpkin—pale human bumpkin but human all the same.
Looking at Cal’s hand as if he’d been offered dead squirrel à la mode, Paul spluttered, “Iris, honey, what the hell is going on?”
“Paul, I told you, it’s not a good time.”
“You’re seein’ someone else?” he exclaimed. “But you didn’t tell me.”
“Technically, I’m not seeing you,” I said, reluctantly adding, “right now.”
His cheeks flushed, as if he had just realized that this whole thing was playing out in front of a shirtless stranger.
“Paul, I’m sorry.”
“No, no.” He grimaced. “That’ll teach me not to call first, I guess. Really, I’m lucky this hasn’t happened before.”
It took me a moment to absorb his full meaning, before I cried, “Hey! That’s not fair!”
“You’re right,” he mocked, his hands up in a defensive position. “I’m just a little upset. I mean, it’s not every day you come over to your girlfriend’s house to find out she’s shacked up with a caveman.”
I scoffed. “Girlfriend?”
“Caveman?” Cal repeated, equally offended.
I pulled at the door before Cal could lumber after him. “I think it’s time for you to go.”
“Iris, can we talk about this?” he asked. “Just tell me what’s going on.”
“Go home, Paul.” I closed the door without another look at him.
“Wha—Iris! You call me if you need anythin’, you hear?” he shouted as the door swept his foot out of the way. Through the door, I heard him yell, “Hey, jackass, I’m calling tomorrow to make sure she’s OK. You hurt a hair on her head, and I’m calling the cops!”
I called, “That’s a little bit of an overreaction, Paul!”
“I don’t like the look of him, Iris!” Paul yelled back.
Cal turned toward the door, eyes narrowed. I had to hook my arm through his to keep him from grabbing for the doorknob. Weakened though he was, Cal still had all that vampire strength, so my shoulders took the brunt as Cal’s forward momentum drove me into the door. I shoved back, hooking my foot around his calf and throwing my weight against him. My hands shot to his shoulders to keep my balance, but my other foot slipped, and I ended up wrapping the other leg around his waist to keep from falling on my butt.
I heard Paul’s truck spin out on the gravel of my driveway, the Southern male equivalent of flouncing away. Struggling between his desire to get through the door and my climbing him like a particularly fetching tree, Cal snapped the knob from the door. He pulled it loose and stared at it incredulously.
For some reason, the sight of my big, bad vampire boarder standing in my foyer staring at my broken doorknob like it was an artifact from some alien civilization struck me as really funny. I roared with laughter, bending at the waist until my head thunked against Cal’s collarbone. I laughed until big, fat tears rolled down my cheeks. As I shook and keened, I became acutely aware of my legs wrapped around his hips, my weight centered over his zipper. And the more I squirmed around, the more that zipper bulged under me. I watched my tears make a watery trail down Cal’s collarbone, down his white skin, and onto my pajama pants. Tense little lines formed around Cal’s mouth as he tried to shift me away from his, er, growing problem.
Desperate to quell the silly, girlie giggle that threatened to bubble up from my chest, I pressed my lips together and pinned them with my teeth. Cal was starting to look uncomfortable … and tired. Even a man with superstrength couldn’t support my weight for any amount of time.
“Kill me now,” I grumbled. I felt Cal’s head duck closer to my throat. I shoved away, whacking my head against the door. I exclaimed, “Poor choice of words! I don’t have an actual death wish.”
“Well,” he quipped. “I can certainly see why you’re so attracted to him. It must be so convenient to have a companion you can stow away in your handbag.”
I groaned, swiping my hands over my eyes. “Why did you do that?”
Cal frowned, glancing down. “Well, you’re not an unattractive woman. It’s a natural reaction even for the undead.”
I burst out laughing. “No, not your, er, problem. Why did you come out here and act like we—like you’re my—why did you make Paul think we were together?”
He glowered at me, but there was no real heat in it. “Did you think I would just stand aside and let you go upstairs for … what did Gigi call it, a booty call?”
I poked his chest, his skin cool and silky against my fingertip. “First, I wouldn’t have done that with you in the house. And second, if I did, it wouldn’t be any of your business. My personal life is personal. This is a business arrangement, not a friendship.”
Cal frowned at this, his eyes scanning my face for a long moment before saying, “I didn’t like the way he talked to you. His attitude toward you, it’s condescending, disrespectful.”
