Page 167 of Healing Eleanor

“Gosh, Eleanor, did you turn your kitchen into a crematorium?” Lily asks, stepping into the kitchen behind Gabriel.

Gabriel spins toward her, frowning. “Honey.” His gaze shifts to me. “I don’t think that’s very nice to say to someone in her condition.”

Lily throws her hands up defensively. “Pregnant or not, it is like a crematorium in here. Sorry, El,” she admits sheepishly.

I lean back against the counter, rubbing my temple. “It’s okay. This is what I get for trying to make dinner on my own. Nik’s running late, and I wanted to get a head start.” I wince. “Even though that clearly didn’t happen.”

“It’s okay, I can go pick something up,” Gabriel offers, already inching toward the door.

“No, no,” I stop him. “I’ll call Nik—he’s already out.”

After an awkward, slightly embarrassing phone call explaining my dinner disaster, Nik agrees to pick up pho, making me solemnly promise no more oven attempts until after the baby.

When I finally collapse onto the couch, I sink next to Lily while Gabriel claims the chair beside us. Almost immediately, they begin peppering me with baby questions, their excitement palpable. They’re both thrilled about being Ivan’s godparents, and honestly, Nik and I couldn’t have picked a better pair to stand alongside us.

But then comes a question that tugs at a wound I’m not ready to revisit.

“Has Vadim come around?” Lily asks softly.

I exhale, sinking deeper into the couch. “No. He hasn’t said a word.”

After Irina’s death, Vadim made it clear he didn’t want Nik around. He couldn't bear to be reminded of all he’d lost. Nik tried, of course. Every so often, he’d reach out, calling, attempting to mend what was broken. But every effort was met with hostility.

His last attempt had been sharing the news of the baby, hoping that Ivan might have at least one grandparent in his life. My mom hadn’t bothered to show up since my engagement, her control over me ended the day I put on that ring. Vadim’s response? Silence. No congratulations, no acknowledgement, nothing.

Nik realized then that some doors couldn’t be forced open.

Together, we are taking the necessary steps to distance ourselves from the toxicity, praying God might one day soften hearts that now remain closed. For now, both Vadim and my mother remained distant, absent from our lives and the life we’re bringing into the world.

Lily’s face softens, and her hand finds mine, squeezing gently. “Well, we’re here for you.”

Gabriel drips his chin in agreement.

“My mom and dad can be grandma and grandpa,” Lily continues, laughing. “The Lord knows they’ve been begging me for a child.” She glances over at Gabriel.

His face turns as red as a tomato. “Not this again,” he mutters under his breath.

I decide to have mercy on him and shift the conversation. “So, where has Dillon been?”

Gabriel shoots me a grateful look. “He’s been spending a lot of time in Raventon.”

My stomach flips like a pancake. Raventon is a crime-ridden town near the Metropolitan Theatre of Ballet. Sofia. Julian. Margaux. Soren. A place where I once felt trapped. I shake off the thought, refusing to dwell on a past I’ve already forgiven.

We move on, chatting about anything and everything involving Lily and Gabriel’s lives, still in awe that they’re even together at all.

When Nik finally comes home, he sets the food down and makes a beeline for me, enveloping me in the biggest hug he can manage. He always prioritizes me and I can’t be more grateful. In our relationship, we always leave space for God to work, and His presence has made all the difference.

As we sit down to eat, I feel the weight of how blessed I truly am. Friends as steadfast as Lily and Gabriel. A husband as extraordinary as Nik. All the things I once thought I was unworthy of. I have a job that fulfills me, a husband who loves me without condition, and friends who stay through even the messiest parts of life.

And to think, years ago, I was a lost girl, my eyes set on one single thing: ballet. But now my world is full of color, my life carrying more than one purpose. Wife, friend, sister, mom.

When we finish dinner, Nik and I hug Lily and Gabriel goodbye, and he takes to cleaning up the remnants of our meal. I won’t lie—I’m glad to sink into the couch and stay put until Ivan arrives.

Once Nik finishes, he stands in front of me, his hand extended. “Dance with me?”

I look at his hand, then down at my belly. “Did you hit your head?”

He chuckles softly. “No, Eleanor. I didn’t hit my head.” He shakes his hand in front of me. “Dance with me.”