Page 106 of Icarus

“The two of you?” Angus’s eyebrows lifted. “Together?”

Then he made an unusual face. Leaned back in his chair for a moment, then returned to writing in his notebook.

“My girlfriend’s dad came back unexpectedly,” he said, repeating Icarus’s words. “I’m assuming Stuart didn’t see you. Otherwise there would have been cops.”

Icarus opened the drawer for a spoon. “You’re not disgusted?”

Angus shrugged. “You think I’d know art, and I wouldn’t understand this?” Then he paused, comprehending what Icarus was actually asking. “The church has laws, yes. But the god I believe in would never embrace a man who turned his face from his son in shame. The god I believe in gave Titian and Donatello their talents and they used them to celebrate the world in His beauty. The god I believe in gave me you.”

His pencil scratching stopped. “Is it illegal?”

Icarus was still processing his father’s words. “What?”

“What you’re about to do? Is it illegal?” Angus asked, finally meeting Icarus’s gaze.

Icarus thought for a bit. “Is it kidnapping if he wants to leave?”

Angus shrugged.

“Do you need money?”

Icarus shook his head. “I have enough.”

“Do you need me? Stuart isn’t a fool; things may have changed between now and then.”

Ah. And that was the question. Icarus considered it, really did, and then he smiled.

“I think having you there might make it worse, actually. I’m fine. I can do it on my own.”

Angus put his hand over Icarus’s, and it felt so strange to have anyone but Celestina do that. It took effort not to snatch his hand back in surprise.

“You’re a good man. But please be careful. The higher you go, the more dangerous it is to get down. Try to leave out the front door if you can.”

Icarus wouldn’t. That was ridiculous. “I’ll try.”

Settle

Sunday came as gentle as spring.

The house was open, free of fear. It wasn’t a home and never would be, but it didn’t feel like a cage to Icarus anymore.

He looked at the back of his father’s neck as he sorted paperwork at the breakfast table and thought about how, if a warden must live in a prison, then in some ways they are a prisoner too.

He let Angus cook for him again. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

When they held service, took the flesh and the blood, Angus didn’t ask if Icarus had any confessions.

He caught Icarus by the cheek and squeezed just once. Then stood up and walked away.

Icarus glanced up, searching for the switch on the mantle, and saw that it wasn’t there anymore.

Eve

His heart raced to think of leaving.

He brought Julian apple crumble again, just to see his face as he gobbled it up.

He jogged next to Luca while they were forced to play football, then stood forehead pressed against his shoulder in the bathroom stall for long minutes before they went to their next class.