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It set the pattern for the days that followed, and although on the surface all was calm and placid Philippa could feel the subtle tension crawling along her nerves. Scott had made no further attempts to enter her bedroom or to touch her in any way. If anything he was extremely remote. Sometimes in the evening he joined them for dinner, although more often he was out, usually with Cara Laine. Simon spent most of his spare time with Eve. He was back at school now and apparently doing well, although once or twice Philippa had caught him scowling darkly.
‘What’s wrong?’ she asked him one night as she tucked him up in bed.
‘It’s that Cara Laine, they’re saying at school that she’s going to marry Dad.’
Philippa sighed, suppressing the words that sprang to her lips. Simon had taken to referring to Scott in this fashion, even though she had told him that he must not. ‘Why not?’ he demanded aggressively now, when she repeated her warning. ‘He is my father, even if you don’t want him to know it. It isn’t fair, I have to pretend that I haven’t got anyone but you, and I have.’
‘Simon.…’ If only she had never come back to Garston none of this would ever have happened. But was she being fair? Simon had known his father’s name and would almost surely one day have wanted to find him. ‘Simon, I know it doesn’t seem very fair, but you have to think of Scott and Eve.…’
‘You mean they wouldn’t want me?’ He was close to tears now and Philippa sighed.
‘Oh, darling, I’m sure they would, but Scott wouldn’t believe me, even if I told him.…’
‘Is he still sleeping with you?’
Philippa caught back her shocked breath. ‘Simon… No! I explained to you why.…’
‘I don’t want him to marry Cara, I don’t like her, and besides.…’
‘Besides what?’ Philippa demanded gently, her heart aching for her son’s pain. Of course he loved Scott, how could she ever have thought he might not, and of course he felt jealous at the thought of his father marrying someone else, having a family with her. She swallowed the huge lump in her throat, knowing that she shared Simon’s jealousy. It had tormented her for days that whereas she should have felt pleased and relieved that Scott had made no further attempts to touch her, what, in reality she did feel, was pain and disappointment.
‘Go to sleep,’ she told him. ‘It will all seem different in the morning.’
When she went back downstairs, intending to watch television for a while, she saw that Eve was already watching it. ‘You look tired,’ the older woman commented. ‘Is Scott over-working you?’
‘Not really; I worry about Simon.’ She bit her lip, wishing she hadn’t made that admission.
‘Yes, it can be very difficult bringing up a child alone, especially a son. He’s very like his father, unbearably so at times.’ She looked up at Philippa who felt her pulses starting to thud, the blood thundering through her veins. She opened her mouth and closed it, grabbing hold of the back of her chair. ‘He is Scott’s son, isn’t he?’ Eve pressed gently, ‘He’s so very like Scott at that age, and of course it would explain so much.…’
Like why Scott had given her a job and had her living in his house? Dear God, what was she going to do?
‘Scott doesn’t know… about Simon, I mean. He thinks.… He thinks—–’ To her appalled dismay Philippa had started to cry, huge tearing sobs that hurt her chest, tears sliding impotently down her face.
‘Oh, my poor Philippa!’ How had she come to be in Eve’s arms crying out her pain and anguish on Scott’s mother’s shoulder—the last person she should be turning to?
‘I’m so sorry,’ she gulped when the flood had ceased, ‘I can’t think what came over me.’
‘I can,’ Eve said dryly. ‘My son can be the very devil at times, and I know for a fact that he’s never forgiven you for what happened all those years ago. I must admit I was surprised—and worried when he told me you were going to work for him and live here. He’s been so bitter. Of course he thinks I don’t know about it. Sons always think their mothers are blind!’ she grimaced faintly, ‘and of course because of my health he always used to think he had to keep things from me, but I could tell. I guessed the moment I saw Simon that he was Scott’s.’
‘Scott thinks he’s Geoff’s son.’
‘Does he indeed? And why I wonder, should he think that? Would you care to tell me?’
It was a relief to talk to someone about it. Eve Garston listened in silence. ‘Jeffrey always did hate Scott. He hated Scott’s father, and he never forgave him for leaving home, for escaping him. When he discovered how much Scott loved Garston it was a weapon he couldn’t resist using against him.’ Eve sighed faintly. ‘When Scott told me you were going to work here I wondered if he wasn’t too much like his grandfather. He’s been so bitter, Philippa.’
‘Yes, I know but what could I do? I knew he loved Garston.…’
‘And you loved him, so you decided that Garston was more important to him than you?’
‘I was seventeen, romantic and full of day-dreams. It never occurred to me that his grandfather was lying to me, or that Scott wouldn’t marry Mary. I thought I was being so self-sacrificing.…’ She grimaced faintly.
‘You played right into Jeffrey’s hands, both you and Scott. My poor child, Jeffrey had no intentions of letting Scott have Garston, and when Scott told him flatly that he wasn’t going to marry her he went a little mad, hurting him every way he could.’
‘As Scott now wants to hurt me.’ Philippa pressed her lips together and slanted a brief glance at Eve.
‘Yes, I’m afraid you’re quite right. I’ve been worried about that, more so since I realised that Simon was his. If he should find out.…’
‘He wouldn’t accept it.’
