Page 37 of Bonds of Shame, Bonds of Lust

I tilted my head. "Isn't that what you're doing? Inviting me to the club, all the rest of it. What's the difference? I'm tired of being the innocent. That's sort of the whole point, isn't it?"

She almost looked guilty. I was getting a whole new range of expression out of my best friend today.

She took a breath. "Okay. Let me get my thoughts straight, babe, before we have a misunderstanding. To be clear, I have no feelings for Ricardo, none. And yes, I hear you, from where you stand I'm corrupting you too. What I mean is this. When he said it, it didn't sound like a man who wanted to show you a new way to live. It sounded like a man who wanted to watch you fall. Like he wasn't the nice guy I've always known. That's all."

"I'm not as delicate as you think. And aside from lying to you for years, I've got, um, kinky fantasies of my own. Ricardo's not going to make me do anything I don't want to do. If anything, I'm afraid of what I'll end up wanting. The idea that he wants to corrupt me." I paused.

"It's a tiny bit hot."

19 - HEADFIRST

Lacey

The dangerous dress was lace over a silk lining, sleeveless, fitted through the bodice and then flaring into an A-line skirt that ended well above the knee. The dress had hung in my closet never worn, waiting for an occasion I kept failing to create.

Tonight was that occasion.

I had my hair done that afternoon. Loose waves, more volume than usual, the stylist talking me into a deep side part and a few pieces framing my face that I'd resisted and then loved. Makeup: mascara, a smoky eye, red lipstick I wiped off twice before deciding to own it and put it back on. The dress hugged my waist, dipped low in the back, and the neckline showed just enough collarbone and the upper swell of my breasts to make me pause at the mirror longer than I'd planned.

I looked sexy.

My heart skipped once, hard.

I looked available. My nipples tightened against the silk. I turned slowly, watching the skirt flare and settle, the fabric whispering against my thighs.

A man would want to take this dress off me.

I blushed. The men who'd shaped my life would have been appalled by how I looked right now. Wanton. Ready.

I loved it.

The doorbell rang.

I grabbed my clutch, slipped on low black heels, and opened the door.

Janice stood on the porch in a crimson halter dress, grinning.

"Look at you." Her eyes swept me head to toe, slow and appreciative. "Jesus, Lacey. You look like sin." I saw her pupils dilate.

I laughed, surprised and nervous at once. "Too much?"

"Exactly enough." She grabbed my arm and tugged me outside. "Come on. I'm driving. You're drinking. That was the deal."

We walked to the Jeep. Janice opened the passenger door for me like an old-fashioned date. I slid in, smoothed the skirt over my thighs, and waited for her to come around. She started the engine and pulled out of the driveway.

I let her get to the end of the block before I said it.

"Here's the deal." My hands were folded in my lap, the knuckles paler than I'd have liked. "I'm not doing the careful thing tonight. Last time I went in trying to manage everything, and I ended up running out. So tonight I'm not saying no on principle. If I want something I'm going to ask for it, or take it, or let it happen."

Janice glanced at me. She let half a block go by.

"That's a lot of words for a woman whose knuckles are white right now."

I looked down. They were. I unfolded my hands.

"Sixty percent."

"What?"