Page 74 of That Ain’t Witchcraft

“What’s that?” asked Leonard.

“Nothing.” He could find out about my specific issues later. Or not at all. I liked option two better.

No ghosts appeared to trouble us as we finished the drive to the house, and if I hustled for the front door a little faster than was seemly, whatever. Let Leonard think I was desperate to get to the bathroom after hanging out in a coffee shop for the last hour. Everybody pees.

Fern and James were in the front room, Fern filing her nails with the careful nonchalance of someone who wanted to be just about anywhere else, James making notes in a small, leather-bound notebook that looked like it had seen better days. The couch had also seen better days. Books covered every square inch that wasn’t occupied by James, and he had enough books piled on his legs that I wasn’t sure he was making a difference in the overall burden.

While the air no longer held the brutally frigid snap of artificial winter, it was still cooler than it should have been, like we’d been running the air conditioning. Sam was nowhere to be seen. I looked around, frowned, and returned my attention to Fern.

“Is he in our room? Because I don’t have time to do another heart-to-heart right now.” Being in a relationship was hard. I still liked it—especially the parts where I got to have sex on a regular basis—but wow was it more work than I had ever realized it was going to be.

Fern shook her head and pressed a finger to her lips, signaling me to be quiet. Oh. I turned, watching as Cylia and Leonard made their way toward the house.

Cylia was in the lead, probably because he assumed she’d know where the traps were. That was why she made it over the threshold while he was still climbing the porch steps, and was safely inside when Sam dropped soundlessly, like something out of a horror movie, from the awning to land behind Leonard.

I’ll give Leo this much: Sam might not have made a sound, but whatever small displacement of the air he’d caused had been enough to clue Leonard to the fact that he was in danger. He stopped walking, back going very straight as he considered his options.

He didn’t have many. Unless he wanted to treat those of us in the house as the “safe” option, which hey, maybe we were. Or maybe this had all been a very complicated murder plan.

“Mutually assured destruction, I thought,” he said.

“Yup,” I agreed amiably. Sam was coming out of his crouch, unfurling behind Leo inch by inch in a manner that would have been unbelievably menacing if I hadn’t found it so ridiculously hot. There was something very wrong with me. I welcomed it.

Cylia grinned. Fern continued filing her nails. James glanced up from his notes long enough to make a disapproving face—less “oh no, a threat to human life is happening where I can see,” more “if I get blood on my book, I’m going to be pissed”—and went back to writing.

“I came in good faith.”

“This time,” I said. “I don’t think I’m your problem, though.”

Finally, slowly, Leonard turned and considered the fūri behind him. Sam was standing completely straight, lips drawn back to show teeth that were thicker and stronger-looking than the human norm, the hair-slash-fur atop his head bristling in a clear threat display. His tail was curved in the high angle that meant he was angry, rather than the relaxed curl of comfort. I took a moment to appreciate all the research I’d done into his semi-unique body language. This little scene would have been a lot less fun if I’d been guessing at whether my boyfriend was really ready to commit murder on my behalf.

He was. He so, so was. All I had to do was say the word and Leonard would be one ex-Covenant member, mostly because they seem to require their members to have heads attached to their bodies.

“Er,” said Leonard. “Hello. I don’t believe we’ve been properly introduced.”

I was impressed. Given how incredibly dedicated to the idea that all cryptids were monsters that needed to be destroyed most members of the Covenant were, I had expected a less civil response. Then again, maybe the fact that Sam looked willing to answer incivility with violence was doing something to temper Leo’s natural instincts.

“No,” said Sam curtly. “We haven’t been.”

“Leonard Cunningham.” Leo stuck his hand out like he fully expected Sam to shake it. “If you kill me, you’ll bring the wrath of the entire Covenant of St. George down upon your head, and the heads of your companions. As you seem reasonably fond of them, I assume you’re not intending to do anything foolish.”

“Nah. Nothing foolish.” Sam’s hand engulfed Leonard’s, long fingers wrapping around it and overlapping onto themselves. Leonard’s back stiffened further as he realized how strong Sam’s grip was.

“I wish I had popcorn,” I muttered to Cylia.

“You and me both,” she said.

“See, you’re right: I like my friends. They’re pretty cool. Even the asshole on the couch isn’t as annoying as I thought he was going to be when I first met him. And you’re right that I don’t want to make trouble for them, since that’s not really friendly-like. But there’s something you’re wrong about.” Sam tugged. Leonard stumbled toward him, unable to break free of the stronger man’s grasp.

I’ll give Leo this much, if nothing else: shaken as he clearly was, he maintained a scrap of dignity as he asked, “What’s that?”

“Annie’s not my friend.” Sam’s smile widened, becoming even more threatening. “You shot her. You shot her with a crossbow, and she fell into the lake. She could have died. You get that, right? She could have died. You did that.”

“I was aiming for you,” said Leo.

“And maybe I could have forgiven you for that—I mean, probably not, but maybe—only you didn’t hit me. You hit her. She could have died.” Sam let go of Leo’s hand so abruptly that the other man stumbled backward, thrown off-balance. Sam looked at him dismissively. “If you ever threaten her again, I’m going to rip your spine out and beat you with it until you stop twitching. If you ever actually hurt her again, you’re going to wish I’d done something as friendly as removing pieces of your skeleton. Got it?”

“Unfortunately, yes,” said Leonard.