Page 39 of A Divided Duty

All the Firstborn come from some combination of Oberon, Maeve, and Titania. Sometimes it’s just one of them, sometimes it’s Oberon and one of his wives, but they all share that common origin. And near as I can tell, the Three weren’t particularly good parents for any of them. But the Luidaeg, as the first of their children, had more time to hope they would be. She had more time to believe in them, and that someday they’d figure out how to care for her in the way she needed them to. Now that Oberon was back again—and utterly failing to step up and fix any of the problems that he created by disappearing in the first place—she was right back to seeking his approval.

I might have had more to say about that if I hadn’t spent so damned long trying to get my own mother to love me. We grow up, but we never outgrow the people we were as children. Not really. Amandine wasn’t even my mother anymore, and I was going to be chasing her approval for the rest of my life. Not for the first time, I promised myself that Miranda was never going to need to feel like this.

“I know you two aren’t just here for the pleasure of my company,” said the Luidaeg brusquely. “Not without calling first, and not when Toby still has ice clumping in her hair. That says Shadow Roads to me, which usually means an emergency. What’s going on?”

“Raysel’s missing,” I said, bluntly. “All signs point to Luna snatching her and making a run for it after Arden said that she’d have to serve the rest of her term of offense.”

“And I take it this is a bad thing? I thought you people were all about reuniting families.”

“Raysel’s terrified of her mother,” I said. “She thinks Luna wants to force her to be someone she’s not, and she doesn’t want to keep letting her down by being the person that she actually is. Raysel wanted to serve the rest of her term, not get abducted from Muir Woods. We need to find her and bring her back to where she’s supposed to be.”

“Such a big word, ‘supposed.’ Everything I can see about the last several years tells me that you were ‘supposed’ to be in that pond, but I bet it didn’t feel like that at the time. Maybe Raysel’s ‘supposed’ to be exactly where she is right now. Did you consider that?”

“You’re the Seer here,” I said. “Shouldn’t you be telling me?”

She made a little scoffing sound that was probably a laugh. “Oh, if only it worked like that,” she said. “Whatever the baby Torquill is up to, it’s not currently earthshaking, and it’s not going to hurt the Roane. That means I don’t see her any more than I see the rest of your landlubber bullshit.”

The Undersea … “Luna threatened the Lordens before she took off with her kid,” I said. “And if we can’t get Raysel back, that’s going to mean she intentionally prevented Dianda from getting satisfaction for her offense. How quickly do you think that’s going to impact the Roane? If Saltmist feels compelled to go to war with the Mists for the sake of their reputation? Lots of Roane living on our coastlines these days. Elizabeth, Diva, Gillian … they’d all be in the line of fire.”

Slowly, the Luidaeg turned to give me a hard, unhappy look. “So you’re learning,” she said finally. “What do you want from me? Let’s start there.”

“Luna’s Blodynbryd. She has access to the Rose Roads back to Blind Michael’s lands,” I said.

“And you think that’s where she took the kid?”

“It’s the only thing that makes sense. Raysel vanished from a sitting room at the royal knowe, and she didn’t use the door. There’s no magical signature there that would indicate one of the Tuatha grabbing her, and that leaves her mom using a Road no one else has access to. Blind Michael’s lands are the most logical place for her to try hiding her daughter.”

“I would argue about that, if I could,” said the Luidaeg. “Sadly, I really can’t. They’re distant, hard to reach, shrouded in bad press from the years my brother spent being an asshole, and Luna still has a key to the back door. It’s where I’d take my kid if I were in her position. Cacie will let them in.”

“Cacie?” asked Tybalt, somewhat blankly.

“Acacia,” said the Luidaeg. “For all my little sister’s many faults, she’s always been there for her children when they needed her. Sometimes that means letting them leave and not asking where they’re going, so your husband can’t force the information out of you; sometimes it means giving them a place to hide when they’ve just abducted their own kids. I’m guessing you’re about to ask me to send you after them?”

“Please,” I said.

“You’ll have to pay.”

“How long do we keep shifting the balance of obligation back and forth between us before we can admit that we’re just trying to help each other?” I asked. “How long do we have to keep the books?”

“Until Titania lets me go,” she said. “So forever, if she has anything to say about it. I can’t send you via the Rose Road, unless you specifically ask me to pry the doors open and damage the foundations; that will cost you a lot more. I could make you a Babylon candle and send you via the Children’s Road—it’s a lot laxer about letting adults in since my brother died and stopped enforcing his ideas about the age restrictions on the place. You didn’t like the Blood Road the last time I helped you use it, and you have a baby at home who probably wants you to come home alive—or would, if she were old enough to understand what ‘alive’ means, or even who you are…”

I managed, barely, not to wince. “Low blow, Luidaeg.”

“Low but honest,” she said, meeting my eyes. “I can’t lie.”

I sighed. “Fair enough, still mean. So the Blood Road’s out. Do we have an option you’re leading up to and trying to make more attractive by being sneaky about it?”

“The Thorn Road,” she said.

I blinked. “I thought that was only for children of Maeve.”

“It was intended for children of Maeve, but anyone can access it if they have the key,” said the Luidaeg. “It doesn’t like being used by other fae. You’ve used it before. You know how to stay on the path, and at this point, the environment isn’t going to be actively hostile to you unless you do something.”

“Why is this better than the Children’s Road?” I asked.

“Because the Children’s Road was never meant to be used by adults. The Thorn Road, though … Mom knew Pete. And Pete wasn’t entirely unique. She’s just the only child of Titania that I raised with my own hands. Mom knew her descendants were more capable of compassion than her sister could ever have dreamt, and while she was careful to make sure the bolt-hole she’d opened for us wouldn’t be taken over if we shared it with our half-siblings, she also knew we might need to help others get away someday, and so she left her road—left our road—accessible when the right protocols are followed. Opening the way with the Summer Roads Key is one of those protocols. Open the door properly and politely, get where you’re going, and get Acacia to give you a door out of the skerry when you’re finished. The Thorn Road is your safest option. Every time someone walks the Children’s Road in an adult body, it destabilizes the foundations just a little more. The road needs time to heal, unless you want it to collapse, and I don’t want to turn you into a kid while you’re lactating. It would stop immediately, and that might screw with Miranda’s meal schedule. Speaking of which, have you called your Fetch yet?”

“No,” I admitted uncomfortably. “I was hoping we’d be back before she could get worried, and Quentin’s going to go make sure she knows what’s up.”