Page 186 of Nyx

"Please," I say. "I want to feel it."

He leans closer, his lips touching mine as he pushes forward one last time.

The throb of him inside of me somehow feels stronger than I imagined it would.

"Fuuuucccckkk," he groans against my mouth.

I use the opportunity to lift my lips half an inch higher, kissing him as he orgasms.

His tongue sweeps against mine, and even at the height of his own release, he doesn't turn aggressive. He doesn't make me feel like my body is only meant for his pleasure. It's passionate and filled with gratitude.

The kiss lasts longer than I expected it to, but when he pulls back, seeming just as breathless as I feel, I find myself clinging to him.

"Sorry," I whisper as he looks down at me, cock still deep inside and showing no signs of flagging.

"Never apologize to me for taking what you need," he says before pressing a soft kiss to my forehead.

The shift of his hips makes me want to reach for him again, but I resist.

I do my best to stifle my moan, but I can tell by the glint in his eyes that he heard it.

"Tell me what you need from me," he says, the warmth of his damp cock settled against my body.

"Can you hold me?" I ask in a moment of vulnerability.

"I was hoping you were going to say that," he says as he shifts to my side before pulling me against his body.

I realized immediately that this was the wrong thing to ask.

I don't know if he can feel the tears that leak from my eyes drop against his skin, but he never says a word.

Chapter 45

Nyx

I promised her that I would never pressure her into doing something she didn't want.

I wouldn't do it when she decided to go back to her apartment after finding out that Whitmore was in the wind after his parole release, and I certainly wouldn't do it after sex.

That's why, when I realized she was going to leave after she thought I had fallen asleep, I stayed still and let her go.

She has had too many people control her life, telling her what to do and when to do it.

Her history has been full of abuse and coercion, and I won't have any part of it.

We may not have a future, but I won't be one more thing she looks back on later in life and regrets.

I can't be another thing she wishes hadn't happened to her in life.

It hurt, the idea that she got what she wanted and then felt the need to be alone, but I don't get to dictate how other people feel.

I had every opportunity to put a stop to things, just as I did with her, and I didn't.

My pleasure came from giving her what she wanted.

I don't regret it, and I never will.

What happened last night was incredibly special, and I'm grateful to have been the man to show her that she deserves respect every second of her life, not just when it's convenient to someone else. She needs to see herself as a priority, and I pray that I was able to make her see that.