Page 61 of A Prudent Engagement

Was she lying?

Had Elizabeth ever said that she loved him or admired him?

Darcy could not remember her having done so once.

That caused the first real piercing sensation of pain.

What if it was all true?

He could hardly think.

He knew what his experience of being near Elizabeth was like, but perhaps he merely saw in her manners what he wished to see and not what was really there.

Would her sister not know her true sentiments far better?

Yet this was the sister who had meant to marry Mr. Bingley without having any particular affection for him.

“Why do you tell me all of this? You know that if I do not marry your sister, it will hurt your prospects and position enormously.”

“Better is a dry morsel, and quietness therewith, than a house full of sacrifices with strife,” Jane quoted in a stiff voice. “I can see how strongly attached you are to Elizabeth, so you must wish to know—simply letting you assume that she holds you in affection would be like a lie.”

Darcy stared at the beautiful young woman dressed all in black.

Jane met his eyes calmly and clearly. She then said again, “Do not let my sister make this mistake. Do not ruin your own future happiness.”

“And why, if she disliked me—I cannot believe this. No, her manners are too…inviting.”

Darcy thought about kissing her.

Had she hated the touch of his lips?

But she had often seemed distant and anxious. Perhaps this was the reason.

“Mr. Darcy, I—you are not a man able to easily understand the minds of women. But as for Elizabeth—I confess I was surprised. I did not think she would agree to marry you, even when it was discussed and Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner advised her to accept you if you offered.”

“You all canvassed the matter? I imagine Mrs. Bennet was given an opportunity to shout about how I would throw the rest of her daughters into the paths of rich men.”

“Mama’s thoughts about marriage are very much the opposite of my own,” Miss Bennet replied. “Lizzy had always said the same—the two of us had always been most firm in our intention to never marry without the strongest love—so I never believed that she would accept an offer without that.”

“The proof of the pudding,” Darcy replied, “is in the eating.”

Miss Bennet said, “She cannot be in her right mind. It is the fear, the shock of Papa’s death. But it is not her responsibility to save us all.”

Darcy paced back and forth for several minutes, his throat working. It was settling into his gut.

The truth of what Miss Bennet said.

He could not doubt her information; the source was too good.

So, this was what Elizabeth truly thought of him.

And she had not told him.

She had lied and pretended to love him. Even if she had never said directly that she admired him.

“I am surprised,” Darcy said at last, “that you sought to convey so much information to me. Should your loyalty not be to your sister?”

“My loyalty is to what is right! And she could not be happy if she was married out of fear to a man whom she does not love. We shall all do better, far better, living out our existence on a few hundred pounds a year. I told her that. I thought she would understand .But she listens too much to Mama.”