Page 8 of No One’s Daughter

​Cheese toasties it’ll be then.

​I made quick work of the prep, paying the cheese tax to Lucrecia and placed the cheese loaded slices under the grill. They’d only take a few minutes but my stomach was already rumbling—again. You’d think I never ate. What the fuck was wrong with me tonight? Had that guy in the club spiked my drink or something? I didn’t feel drugged, but something was off.

​I filled the kettle—maybe a nice herbal tea would calm me—and put it on, then sank into the sofa as I waited.

​A solemn birthday card from the previous week was still displayed on the mantlepiece. Twenty-seven fucking years on this God forsaken planet. I picked at the chipped nail varnish on my nails, an unfortunate habit I’d developed years ago. It was the only card I’d received this year, from Claire of course. She’d overcompensated in her gift this year—from pity I fear. I think she secretly worried that I didn’t have enough people around me. She was the opposite of me, in every way. Happy to be surrounded by people, bubbly and chatty, whereas I on the other hand much preferred my own company, loathed small talk and just didn’t fit in. I preferred to be anonymous, to disappear in large crowds and do my own thing. But, it wasn’t that I didn’t have any friends. It was just that none were particularly close, but that was by my own design. I was happy with how my life was… I think.

​I pulled a blanket over myself and gestured for Lucrecia to join me, which she happily did—never one to turn down a cuddle.

​I was so busy petting her and thinking about the guy from the club that I had momentarily forgotten about my hunger. I shook my head in thought. He was… different. Something about him was unlike any other guy I’d been with. He was cocky, sure, but he wasn’t arrogant. And I mean, he had good reason to be sure of himself. But it was more than that. I hated to admit it, but I felt like I’d clicked with him on some other level. Some primal thing, maybe.

​“Oh shit!” I cried out as the room filled with the smell of burning cheese, I had lost track of time. I hurried over to the grill, quickly pulling out my bubbling cheese toastie with its charred edges. As ever, Lucrecia watched the whole scene unfold, her bewitching emerald eyes fixated on me, perfectly aloof. I supposed to her, this was entertainment.

​“It’s fine” I said, waving her away as she looked at me like I was the dumbest person alive. I had no doubt her opinion of me must have been low, given the way she always looked at me. Yet she chose to stick around. Perhaps because she thought I was some wounded animal needing a minder. That minder of course being her with all her worldly wisdom and culinary skills.

Still, I enjoyed her company, it made the flat feel less lonely. At least with her here I was chatting to her, not talking to myself… quite as much.

I set my only slightly burnt midnight snack down on the kitchen table, pulled out a chair for myself and sat with that ravenous hunger back with a vengeance. In fact, I don’t remember the last time I felt this hungry. I was beginning to think this cheese toastie might not cut it, just as the burger and chips I’d scoffed down only an hour ago hadn’t.

Maybe I had a parasite or something—didn’t they make you super hungry? I swore I’d heard that in a documentary once. I sighed with a sinking feeling, doing my best to shake the thought from my mind, and took a bite.

Just as I’d swallowed my last bit, my fears were confirmed.

I was indeed still fucking hungry, like I hadn’t eaten anything at all.

And then—

There was pain.

Excruciating pain.

The kind that was felt in every nerve of your body all at once. I crumpled to the floor, gasping for breath just as the pain soared through my body, culminating in one place.

A million little stabs to my mouth.

​Dental pain?

​What the fuck?

​I couldn’t think.

​I bit down on my tongue instinctively, trying to numb the pain with pressure, but it didn’t work. I ran my tongue over my teeth, pushing against each in turn to try and locate the source.

​Had I chipped a tooth? No, that wouldn’t hurt like this…

​And I would have noticed that.

​I couldn’t recall any sensitivity in my teeth recently, never mind anything close to this pain.

​I groaned, pushing myself up from the floor and stumbled into the bathroom. A shiver broke out over my skin as I was hit with another shot of pain. I leaned against the bathroom doorframe for support, clutching my jaw, desperately trying to quell the throbbing pain. Nausea rose so suddenly I couldn’t stop my stomach emptying itself. Thankfully, the toilet bowl was right at the entrance to the small room.

​What the fuck was happening, I pleaded with my subconscious for answers.

​I righted myself, inhaling a shaky breath.

Then it was gone—the pain—all of it… just… gone.

I pulled myself to the sink, splashing a handful of cold water over my face. I glared at the mirror in front of me. I was still me. But somehow, I also wasn’t. I felt as though I was looking at a stranger who looked like me. I couldn’t put my finger on what exactly it was that felt so… different, just that now familiar feeling rising in me again—the strange one. My reflection was paler than usual, and my eyes seemed darker as if such a thing were possible.