Page 14 of A Courage of the Chosen

Tentatively, I explore this new bond. It’s not so different from the one that exists between Callahan and I, but I have less control. Tavish is able to insert his thoughts in my mind, even while I’m blocking him the way I was taught.

I don’t speak back to him. He doesn’t get any more pieces of me, and I do my best to snip myself free from his hold. But I didn’t open this connection, so am forced to feel Tavish’s presence as it settles like a content predator, basking in the moment his prey will fall into his trap.

Lurking. Stalking. Waiting.

What he doesn’t realize is that I’m not his prey. He’s mine. And I’m coming for him.

Chapter 4

Elsie

The next day is a wake-up call on how underprepared I am to be queen. I spent the entire day sequestered away in the council chamber with the same seven people, mostly quiet as they argued about anything and everything. I asked where Raghnall would be hiding now, and that resulted in another debate on where he could be that lasted an hour, and ended with me being the liar again.

My voice grew smaller as the hours ticked by, and even Hector’s support wasn’t enough to fend away the loneliness that seeped deeper the longer we sat there.

I elbow the door of my room open, rubbing my temples with my fingers, and stop short when I see Reyne and Rach waiting for me. Unlike yesterday, they hadn’t been allowed in the council room, and finding them here nearly breaks the fragile hold on my emotions.

“That bad, huh?” Rach says, from her spot on the sofa before the roaring fire.

“You have no idea,” I groan and plop down next to her.

“Wanna talk about it?” Reyne asks.

I look at them both, the day’s events ready to spill from my lips.

There’s one thing that has stolen my focus repeatedly, and it’s that same place I drift to as the support of my friends embraces me.

“I miss him,” is what comes out instead. The space that Callahan has carved out for himself has been empty for too long, and the need to feel him there is beyond desperate.

Rach’s face puckers with the same pain in my voice, and Reyne scoots into an upright position.

“I know, lass.”

“He’d have been better at this than me,” I say softly, and release a wobbly breath as I tip my head back to stare at the ceiling, daring to let my inadequacy surface.

“Hey.” Rach nudges my leg with her foot and draws my gaze. “Don’t put yourself down like that, you’re one of the strongest people I know. You’ve got this. You’re Elsie-freaking-Aitken. Remember that.”

Reyne moves to my other side and perches on the edge of the sofa. “She’s right. Look at everything else you’ve faced and you’re still standing. Don’t let them win.”

“Thank you,” I whisper.

“If you want me to hunt that greasy weasel down and throat punch him, just say the word,” Rach offers a little too quickly.

But it breaks my mood and I huff a laugh. “I might take you up on that.”

We have dinner together, the three of us choosing to sit on the ground by the fire, surrounded by throw pillows and blankets as we decimate giant bowls of couscous, chicken, and salad. They patiently wait for me to share my day with the council, and when I eventually tell them, they listen supportively, offer me advice, and boost me in the way only they can. It’s exactly what I needed, and I go to bed with hope that tomorrow might be different.

I wish that was the case, but it unfolds exactly like the day before. Some of it is useful discussion about the available resources and the number of soldiers we have. But most of it is spent doubting me and Hector.

“It’s too easy,” Lady Navin said.

“I’m not convinced we would have missed this.” Lord Haddow was having a hard time with the concept that the Dorche had been under their noses for so long and they’d been blind.

I lost count of how many times they asked me the same thing disguised in a different form, and how many times they implied my story was nonsense.

Lord Garside’s questions were the hardest, the most cutting, but he wasn’t the cruelest.

No. That was Hume’s wheelhouse. He was as vicious as always, but in a calculated way that made him appear to be as loyal as the rest of them.