Page 36 of Care: Part 1

He was gently pulling away only to enjoy the way she pushed her lips even closer just to keep kissing him. She didn't want it to end, just like Adrik didn't want it to end. It took everything within him to not throw her on the sofa and have her in a million different ways.

Suddenly, there was a knock that pounded on the door. Avelina jumped and was quick to pull away just before slipping from Adrik's arms.

Her eyes immediately dropped down to look at the ground as she realized what just happened. That kiss felt like it was more than a kiss. She couldn't even bring herself to look at Adrik.

Adrik stared at her. He was trying to figure out what was going on in her mind and why she wouldn't even bother to spare him a glance. When another knock echoed against the door, Adrik turned away from Avelina. He pulled open the front door and quickly grew frustrated when he saw Viktor had been outside the door.

"What the fuck do you want?" Adrik questioned in Russian.

Viktor glanced over at Avelina, his eyes trailing down her body. He had never seen a woman in Adrik's home before, but he understood how she managed to squeeze through Adrik's scary exterior. She looked to be the most beautiful woman Viktor had ever seen.

"The wedding," Viktor spoke.

Adrik noticed the way his eyes were on Avelina. "If you ever look at her again, I will kill you, along with everyone you have ever loved.”

Viktor gave Adrik a curt nod before turning on his heel and heading into his car.

"Avelina," Adrik called out to her.

She finally looked at him with a look he couldn't seem to figure out. Was she angry, sad?

He wanted to punch something out of frustration. He wanted to be able to talk to Avelina. He needed to find some way for her to choose him.

Adrik couldn't help but feel down at the thought that maybe that is why she didn't want him. It was because he couldn't care for her the way she wanted him to.

He hated himself more than he ever hated anything because Adrik wished he was normal. Just like what everyone used to scream at him when he was a kid, 'be normal.’ His mother said it, his father said it. At some point, Adrik would repeat those words to himself every day. Be normal.

When Adrik was a kid, he couldn't help it when he would repeat the slang people would use around him to practice normal communication. They punched and bruised him just because he only wanted to help when he told the boy that he needed to brush his teeth more, and the girl that she should stop eating so nasty because she resembled a cow with the way she chewed her food.

No one noticed him with a purple and bloody face because everyone was so happy that it finally swelled his lips shut. No longer were words seeping from his mouth to anyone only because he was scared.

He had no friends at school. All the teachers knew he was too smart for his age, so they didn't interact with him much because they didn't feel the need. Every time they tried to talk to the odd boy, he would ramble about Ludwig van Beethoven.

They found him strange in the way he never ate any food at school. He always had to eat the same thing at the same hour. He held such great posture with big gray eyes that were so eager to learn something new. His vocabulary from so many different languages were already so articulate that he sounded more intelligent than his teachers. It scared the other kids. It scared the teachers.

No one ever chose him until he got older and wealthy. No one ever picked him until he had gotten powerful, so it struck fear into everyone.

As he looked at Avelina, he realized that she could see what those kids at school had seen in him. A weird, strange, odd little boy who will never be normal.

"I'm sorry. I was caught up in the heat of the moment, and it won't happen again. It was a mistake," Avelina told him.

He looked away from her as he finally recognized exactly how she was feeling—ashamed. He knew she was ashamed of the kiss, ashamed of how she felt, and, most of all, she was ashamed of him.

"I agree.”

She looked at him, surprised. Knowing that Adrik never tells a lie, it only seemed to hurt her. At least deep down, she knew she was only lying to herself. She enjoyed that kiss, and it scared her how much she wanted more of him.

"Adrik," she spoke, grasping his arm.

He snatched his arm from her hold and began to walk towards the door where he held it open for her.

"I am not sure what you learned about autism, but I am not a fucking robot. I feel everything you are telling me, and it hurts. You tell me you do not want me, but then you tell me to kiss you. So, I kissed you, and now you tell me you don’t want me again. Well, for once, I do not want you. So, yes, Avelina, the kiss was a mistake. It will always be a mistake.”

Without another word, he walked out of the house and left her stummed. She never expected that from him.

Her head hung low in sadness as she walked out of the house and towards the vehicle. Slowly, she made her way into the car. Her gaze cast out the window when the door shut, and the car began to move.

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