Page 39 of The Doctors Will See You Now

“Okay, thanks. I’ll be right there.”

She studied me briefly before nodding and making a retreat down the hall.

I watched her go until I was sure the coast was clear and then lifted my hand. The ink had bled a little into the wood, but all in all, the affirmation was still legible. I read it a couple of times.

God, that’s corny.

Opening the middle drawer of my desk, I picked up the tongue depressor and tossed it in.

Maybe I’d give it to her someday, but I’d already put myself out there enough for one day. Humiliation really is the sort of thing to which you have to acclimate—one painful encounter at a time.

Friday was my second favorite F word. And since my other favorite F word wasn’t appropriate to use in a work environment, I settled for repeating the one word that I could. Both of them brought me joy.

“Friday. Friday,” I singsonged as I finished cleaning up exam room five. “Thank God it’s Friday.” I continued the tune as I skipped toward the nursing office to make sure there weren’t any outstanding voice mails from patients waiting to be called.

“If you say Friday one more time, I will strangle you with this blood pressure cuff,” Marlene huffed in her designated chair in front of her designated computer. I scrunched my face behind her back.

No, we didn’t all have our own chairs and desks and computers—just Marlene. She’d claimed hers, thirty-five years ago, according to her, and it was a certainty that unless you wanted to see the giant white light guiding you toward the pearly gates, you stayed the fuck away. The torn-up piece of masking tape haphazardly placed across each item even said that in black Sharpie. This is Marlene’s. Stay the fuck away.

“Oh, c’mon, Mar,” I said with a grin. “Everyone loves Fridays. It’s like a universal religion. It melts people from all over the world into one big pot.”

Though, the truth of it was, I’d had a fucking knot in my stomach ever since I’d turned Will down, and some of my weekend cheer was probably a means to cope. But she hadn’t turned down one of the nicest guys she’d ever met for the date she’d been fantasizing about ever since she’d met him.

Had she?

“Not me,” she muttered. “Especially when it’s my weekend to be on call.”

See what I meant earlier? Tuesdays were Marlene’s favorite day of the week.

I honestly didn’t know what she did on her days off. I’d often try to imagine it, but I usually ended up picturing her yelling at a young grocery store cashier about the rising prices of pork loin.

“You shouldn’t have too many calls, though,” I reassured, even though I knew it was useless. “There’s only a handful of patients that could deliver this weekend, and most of them are on their second and third pregnancy. It’s old hat for them.”

“Yeah, right,” she huffed her disagreement. “I’m sure one of the thirty-weekers will gorge themselves on chili dogs and then call in a panic because they’re confusing gas pain with contractions.”

“Always the optimist,” I teased with a laugh.

“Keep laughing. But I know you’ll be just like me one day,” she stated with a pointed brow in my direction.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Remember this conversation after you’ve been doing this job for another twenty years, and then you’ll understand.”

Doing this job for another twenty years?

Jesus Christ, I hoped not.

I mean, I didn’t mind this nursing job. I often found myself enjoying the patient interactions, and since Will had recently added hospital deliveries to my list of job responsibilities, I hadn’t found myself getting bored.

But deep down, I knew this wasn’t my final career stop. Eventually, I wanted to do something else, something more. I wanted to feel like I had a true purpose.

Running a women’s clinic for the underserved population.

It had been on my mind since Carmen’s prolapsed cord delivery. I couldn’t shake the nagging thought that her situation could have ended terribly. Sure, no medical professional can predict emergent situations like a prolapsed cord, but in her case, she could have been more educated. She could have actually received prenatal care throughout her entire pregnancy. Her baby’s fate wouldn’t have had to rest on a stroke of luck.

Because Carmen and her little girl were lucky.

If she hadn’t been at the hospital the exact moment her water broke, the baby wouldn’t have made it. If something had been wrong with Carmen’s baby, it would not have been detected until delivery, and then, it might have been too late. So many factors, and thank God, fate was in Carmen’s favor that day.