Page 49 of Blaze

“Tell me I’m doing the right thing,” I choke, and Bones sighs.

“She’ll kill your girl, she’s already tried once, and it's like Cage explained when you joined in on church over the phone an hour ago, she’s dangerous, she won’t stop. Even if we got her arrested, she has too many people she’s fucked that she can get to go after Blair, this is the only way.” Bones says, and I nod once before starting my bike, keeping my eyes on my home, where thankfully, the bedroom my wife is currently sleeping in is soundproof.

When I messaged Cage to move church up a day, I was fucking grateful, but having these men stand behind me is fucking everything.

“Let’s ride, brothers,” I say before pulling away from my home, and the brothers follow suit. Cage rides in front of me within seconds before we roar off down the road, ready to get rid of a threat. A threat, not just to my club, but my wife and unborn child, the two things I never thought I would have but suddenly need.

***

We stop just before the trailer park so we don’t oust ourselves and my palms begin to sweat.

I’ve never felt guilty about a kill before, put El, fuck, I don’t love her, but I did care for her, I wanted to save her. Her lifestyle is exactly how my mom’s was, I just didn’t realize she was so far gone.

“Brother, we can do this if you can’t…” Cage says softly seeing that I’ve frozen, and I shake my head.

“I have to do this,” I mutter as Tray brings the gasoline and I take the lighter from him.

“Over ten years of fucking someone can make it hard, we understand if you can’t,” Trick says, and I take a deep breath.

They think I have feelings for her, and I’m grateful they aren’t judging, but I don’t, and I need them to know that I don’t. I don’t need them fucking pitying her over something that isn’t there.

“My mom is dead,” I announce into the darkness, and everyone freezes while Killer steps forward because, of course, he and the old timers had to follow the prospects.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” he demands, and I swallow hard.

Am I surprised Alice didn’t tell him? Hell fucking yeah, I am, but I am grateful to her. My respect for the woman who wants the motherly role in my life has doubled.

“She died last year of an overdose, I was the one who found her after her drug dealer called demanding money. It’s why I said I’d claim El, because I have known her all my life, and I wanted to try and drag her away from going down the route my mom did. I felt like I was obligated to save her,” I admit.

I look down the rocky road, my eyes just seeing the trailer I grew up in.

“I’m not in love with El, I don’t even have love for her but there was a caring feeling because I wanted to help get her out of this life,” I choke before looking at the brothers, “I have guilt because I never saw the conniving cunt that she was. That I waited until now to put her down, that I even considered claiming her without seeing what she was going to do to the club. I was dead set against falling in love. That is why I’m finding this difficult. I’m basically going against what I promised her at ten years old, that I’d protect her, that I won’t allow her to end up like my mom, not seeing the thrill she got from this life. Even back then, after I caught her stepfather apparently raping her, and you boys helped me cover it up after I killed him…”

“Fuck me, she was sleeping with him and made you think otherwise,” Cage grunts, and I tick my jaw but nod.

“She played me well and truly hoped I’d fall in love with her. When that didn’t work, she used my mom's lifestyle to keep me with her, but she never expected Blair to walk into my life and tear her plans to shreds,” I say as I eye the trailers, and I sigh, “Let’s go get this shit over with. I want to get home to the woman who made me want everything I was against.”

I walk down the road, holding the lighter tightly as my heart pounds and I ignore the brothers behind me following, seeing exactly where I grew up, all while Killer’s eyes burn into my back.

The guilt is fucking horrible, and my head is a mess. Just because I’ve found my one and made her mine, doesn’t mean I can’t be sad for the life I’m now going to take, the life I wanted to help save.

I stop before the door and flick the lighter as Tray silently runs around the trailer, spreading the gasoline while my little brother padlocks the front door, making sure she can’t get out before his eyes go to the two trailers to my right, and he shakes his head, muttering, “I fucking hate that you and Alex lived here.”

I give him a smile before it falls when the door tries to open, and I hear, “What the hell?” when it rattles, and I put my cold face on just as El’s panicked one comes into view, along with a guy who has a cannon tattoo with blood dripping from it.

“Blaze, what?” she gasps, and I tilt my head and call, “Looks like we’re getting two for one, brothers, one woman who tried having my old lady raped and a Charger that wants to take down our club so they can sell kids off our streets.”

“I-I, Blaze, please, open the door,” she panics as the Charger roars, “The place stinks of gasoline!” and I flick the lighter, the flame larger, and El rattles the door harder.

“Blaze, please, you know me, you don’t want to do this, please, don’t do this,” she cries, “I’m your friend, we grew up together.”

I tilt my head at her as Killer says quietly, “She’s trying to play on the part of you that still feels the need to protect her son, don’t listen to her,” but I ignore him, and I ask, “How did you get your stepfather to fuck you like he was raping you?”

What can I say, my curiosity has climbed a little, I mean, the woman fucking played me, and instead of backing down in claiming her, I double down because I didn’t want to hurt Blair.

I’m a fucking idiot, is what I am.

“I told him it was my kink,” she chokes, “I’m sorry, Blaze, I really am, I just don’t know how to get out of the trailer park, it’s my life, it’s what I grew up in.”