Page 43 of Always, in December

Liam’s gaze flickered between Max and Chloe. ‘Right,’ he said. ‘And, umm, why did you leave her, exactly?’

Max gave Chloe a do not say anything look, and she huffed out a breath. Liam looked between them. ‘Right,’ he said again. ‘Well, I’ll get us more drinks, shall I?’ Max nodded gratefully. God bloody love Liam – he never pushed, not when it was clear you didn’t want to talk about something. It was part of what made their friendship so easy.

His gaze shot to the corner of the room. Josie was coming out from where the loos were now. Was it just him, or was there more of a tightness to the way she was holding herself? He did a quick scan of the room, located Oliver chatting to another old guy in a suit, intently focused on what the guy was saying and apparently oblivious to Josie. Now was the time, then.

He’d barely taken a step, when Chloe swung round in front of him again. ‘Do you really think that’s such a good idea?’ He said nothing. ‘What are you going to say?’

He spared Chloe a brief glance. ‘I don’t know. I need to explain.’

Chloe huffed out a breath. ‘She’s with someone else now, there’s no point in confusing the issue.’

Max scowled. ‘That guy’s a dick.’

Chloe scoffed. ‘That’s hardly the point. And what about Erin?’ Max could only glare at her. Liam stepped towards them and handed them both a drink, looking very like he was trying to think of something constructive to say, which, in all fairness, was more difficult when you had very little idea as to what was going on. Chloe sighed. ‘It’s not fair, Max. To anyone. I just don’t think you should open it all up again.’ She tapped her fingers on the stem of her wine glass. ‘Though you didn’t have to make it so bloody dramatic when you left – what happened to the good old petering things out over WhatsApp?’

Max narrowed his eyes, then turned to Liam. ‘Did I ever tell you about the time Chloe told a guy she actually had a twin, and the twin and her had been swapping with him and now she had to come clean – just to get him to dump her?’

Liam raised his eyebrows. ‘A twin, hey?’

Chloe flushed. ‘Look, it wasn’t that bad, I just . . .’

And with that, Max took his exit. He caught up with Josie and reached out to take her elbow before she could clock him. She stumbled a little and when she looked up at him, colour flooded her face. She wrenched her arm from his a little forcefully.

‘Sorry,’ he said quickly. ‘I just . . . Can I just talk to you for a second?’

She hesitated, studying his face like she was deciding something, then gave a single, jerky nod. ‘Alright.’

She followed him to the nearest corner, one where the light barely reached. To lead her downstairs might be a bit too suspicious. Once there, she crossed her arms, waiting, and he cleared her throat. ‘I didn’t expect to see you here tonight.’

She raised her eyebrows. ‘Well, that makes two of us,’ she said.

‘I just . . .’ Jesus, get a fucking grip, Max. ‘I wanted to apologise for how I left things with you.’

Her eyes stayed cold and even, but when she nodded slowly, her expression flickered. ‘Yes. It wasn’t ideal, I’ll admit.’ He winced at her tone.

‘I just . . .’ he tried again, but she shook her head to cut him off.

‘Look, it’s alright. It was just a bit of fun, wasn’t it?’ She sighed. ‘And ok, maybe I got caught up in the romanticism of it all, but it was really just a fling, wasn’t it?’ She dropped her arms to her sides and straightened her shoulders. ‘You don’t owe me anything, so don’t worry about it, ok?’

He scowled, tried to think of something to do with his hands that wasn’t balling them into fists. He wanted her to be angry at him. Somehow, this ambivalence was worse – because if it had just been a fling, then why couldn’t he get her out his damn head? He took a breath, tried one more time. ‘I wish—’

‘Look, Max, we’ve both moved on, haven’t we?’ She gave a pointed look across the room and Max saw Erin gliding over to Chloe, who was beckoning her over, clearly trying to keep her distracted.

Max looked back at Josie and frowned. ‘You haven’t moved on. You’re moving backwards.’ He was trying to get a rise out of her, but other than a slight tightening of her lips, he got nothing. He wanted to shake her, to snap her out of this weird composure and back to the real Josie, the one he’d met at Christmas, not this cardboard cut-out version who he couldn’t get a read from.

Josie shook her head firmly. ‘You might think that, but I don’t.’

‘What?’

She lifted her chin. ‘I haven’t moved backwards. I’m living in New York, aren’t I?’ She gestured around the room, then cocked her head in that way of hers. ‘As I seem to recall, you thought I was secretly the adventurous type. So, maybe you were right.’ The way she said it, it was like he could hear the shrug in her voice, but then their gazes locked and he wondered if she remembered that evening as vividly as he did. The cocktail bar, her eyes dancing in the candlelight. The taste of her when he’d kissed her later.

‘Is that her?’ Josie asked abruptly, glancing again at Erin, almost like she couldn’t help herself. When Max frowned, she added, ‘The girl who broke your heart?’ He stared at her for a moment. Well, what had he expected her to think? He’d allowed her to think that he’d had his heart broken, as an easy and less complicated explanation for why he’d been so off with her at the start. He remembered it in excruciating detail, the weight of what he’d been feeling, and how she’d pulled him out of it, even though he’d been downright rude when he’d first met her. He started to shake his head, to explain that yes, she was his ex but no, she wasn’t the reason he’d been like that. Out of the corner of his eye he noticed Chloe sneaking glances over at them, and he could almost hear her telling him to leave it alone. Then Josie raised a hand to someone across the room, smiled and nodded, and Max turned to see Oliver looking over at them. Just like that, his time was up.

Josie curled a strand of hair around her ear and took a step way. He saw her hesitate, turn back. She blew out a breath. ‘Look, Max, I can’t say it’s not a little strange, seeing you here. But honestly, just so you don’t feel bad or whatever, you leaving, in the way you did, was probably the best thing that could have happened to me.’ Her gaze flickered over to where Oliver was waiting for her, then briefly to the ground before meeting his again. ‘It made me realise what I had with Oliver,’ she said firmly. ‘Made me realise I wanted to give it another go.’

‘He cheated on you,’ Max said flatly.

‘I’m well aware of that, thanks,’ she said tightly, in a way that made him regret it. ‘But everyone can make a mistake.’ That head-cock again. ‘Or are telling me you never have?’ He said nothing because no, he obviously couldn’t tell her that, could he? ‘And I got to come out here,’ she continued, ‘and we’ve been going to Broadway and Central Park and everything – things I never would have dreamed I’d do, which has been just . . .’– she waved a hand in the air – ‘amazing.’ She nodded, like that was the word she’d been searching for. ‘It’s been amazing,’ she repeated.