Page 108 of The Christmas Letter

‘That’s wonderful, Holly.’

‘Yeah. It is.’ She paused, then ploughed on. ‘You know, you can make sculptures from anywhere.’ She said it casually, trying to disguise the way her heart stepped up a gear, as she put it on the line.

‘I suppose that’s true.’ The same casual tone, matching hers.

‘And there are teaching jobs everywhere too.’

‘Also true.’

She took a deep breath. Here was the leap. ‘I’m sorry for what I said at the wedding. You were right. I was closing myself off. Ever since Lily . . . You know, I spoke to her the other day. Realised I’d got a few things wrong.’ She shook her head. ‘I got something else wrong too.’ It would hurt. If she was wrong about this, if he didn’t still feel the same. ‘I should have said yes. When you asked me to give us a go. And if you still want me, I want to try, too.’

He looked at her in a way she wasn’t sure how to read. ‘Holly, I—’

‘No, wait,’ she said quickly, trying to keep the panic from her voice – the thought that he might say no making her feel as though her chest was being crushed in. ‘I’m not finished.’

He opened his hands in invitation.

‘I want to say, I was wrong about something else, too. Because I know you, Jack. I know the way you are never as happy anywhere as you are out in the countryside. I know about your impossible ability to keep what you’re thinking off your face. I know your playful side, which only comes out now and then, but which is even more brilliant because of that. I know that you are generous, and I know how much you love your family, even when you’ve been unsure about how to handle that in the past. I know how much you care about your brother and sister, and how you will make sure you’re always there for them.’ She reached out to touch his face, and he stayed very still. ‘I know that it hurt so much, when your dad died. I know that you ran from the past, because what other choice was there? And I know how brave you are, that you found a way to face it all again.

‘I know all of that and more. And I love it all, Jack.’

She saw the smile before it came, saw the way his dark eyes warmed. ‘You love it all, huh?’

She laughed, breathlessly and nudged him in the side.

He caught her wrist, pulled her to him, and she let out a long breath as he folded her against him.

‘I was just going to say,’ he said, ‘that of course I want this, us. It’s all I’ve been thinking about for months.’

She smiled into his chest. ‘Really?’

‘Yeah. But I’m glad you interrupted me. That was quite the speech, I would have hated to have missed it.’

‘Just returning the favour.’

He rested his forehead against hers, their breathing matching in rhythm. Then she tilted her face up, and he kissed her, tentatively, like he couldn’t quite believe it. And she kissed him back, allowing his woody scent to wrap around her, wrapping her arms around his neck to bring him closer.

She broke away, needing to say it, needing for him to know. ‘I love you, Jack Tooley.’

And there it was, the smile – the full one, the one that lit up his whole face.

‘This,’ she breathed as she traced it with one finger. ‘I want to sculpt this.’

He laughed, squeezed her waist. ‘Why, when you’ve got the real thing right here?’

‘Because then I’ll always have you.’

His arms tightened around her. ‘Don’t say that. I want you to sculpt it too, but not for that reason. Because I won’t leave you. We found each other. I think we were always meant to find each other.’

This time, she didn’t contradict him.

‘I won’t leave you, because I love you too, Holly Griffin.’

And the words were said with such promise that she found she could believe them.

They both started at the sound of Emma’s voice. ‘Once you two have finally kissed and made up, could you come back inside and close the door? It’s bloody freezing!’

Holly laughed, dashed away a tear that she didn’t realise had escaped. And then, hand in hand with Jack, she headed back inside to welcome in Christmas.