Page 52 of Counting Down To You

“I…” I bite my lip. “I don’t know.” I hadn’t thought of that.

“Did she say you have to do it alone?”

“Well…no.” But is it cheating? And also…“Who are you thinking of? Because I’m not sure I want to get up there with Charlotte.”

He smiles a little at my attempt at a joke. Then shrugs. “Me,” he says.

I stare at him. “You?”

“Sure. I’ll sing it with you. What are good boyfriends for?”

I huff out a laugh. Which is better than almost sobbing a few minutes ago. I still feel emotional, and I hate the fact that I lost it in front of everyone. That he saw. But he’s here. He’s offering to help me. Again.

I cock my head. “You know Madonna?”

“Everyone knows Madonna.” It’s said so seriously, I have no idea if he’s joking. He shrugs again. “We’ll work it out.” He gestures back toward the bar, then holds a hand out for mine.

I look down at it. It’s all part of the act, right? Him singing with me, holding my hand as we walk back inside in front of everyone. But the problem is, right then, I want the help. I want to do this challenge—because if I don’t do this one I know I’m going to spiral. And, also, I want to take his hand.

“Okay,” I murmur, and link my fingers with his.

He leads me back onstage. The piano guy catches my eye and smiles encouragingly. The small act of kindness makes my throat clog again, but I swallow it down. Leo takes one microphone, hands me the other. There is a whoop from the crowd—Elodie, maybe?

Leo holds my gaze, smiling at me. And, God, a whole host of new nerves twists in my stomach, that I’m doing this in front of him. But I’m looking at him, not at the crowd, as the piano starts to play.

His voice comes out first, loud, and ever so slightly off-key. It makes me feel somewhat better, that he isn’t a great singer. It means I’m able to sing too. Tentatively, my voice scratchy and unconfident. But I’m singing.

Leo only knows half the words, and he covers up the ones he doesn’t know with versions of “la,” mostly off-key. There is more whooping in the crowd, a shout of “Go, Brooks!” I find myself laughing into the microphone, and when Leo catches my eye and grins back at me, my stomach flips. I might not love being the center of attention, but I can’t deny I like having his attention.

I look away from him, back out to the crowd as we sing the last chorus. And it is not a room full of strangers that I see. Because Robyn is there, watching me, cheering me on. I can imagine her face in the crowd, laughing and whooping like the rest of them and being so damn proud of something so silly.

It’s not silly. And you’re damn right I’m proud.

At the end of the song, Leo takes my hand and pulls me into a dramatic bow, as everyone claps. It feels surreal, almost like it didn’t happen. But it did. I did it. I didn’t let Robyn down. I can still do this. I’ll keep going with the challenges, get as many done before Christmas as I can, like we always used to.

Leo tugs me to the side of the makeshift stage as Charlotte and a few of her friends gather around a single microphone, apparently gearing up for a group act. He grins down at me and holds his hand up for a high five.

On impulse, I hug him instead, my arms wrapping around his back. “Thank you,” I murmur into his chest. I don’t think he can know how much this has meant to me, but I am so grateful, and I try to convey that in a hug.

I realize too late that I’ve let it go on a fraction longer than is perhaps wise. I still have hold of him, am still resting my head against his chest, breathing in the warm, spicy smell of him. And I notice that his arms are around me too. Lightly there, holding my back. I ease away and his fingers briefly tighten, holding me in place.

I look up at him. His face is so close, only a few centimeters between us. His gaze drops to my mouth, back up. Candlelight flickers in his eyes, which definitely look darker than they did a second ago.

Oh, shit. I want him to kiss me. I want to lean in, to feel his mouth against mine, to know what he tastes like. Because I want that, I pull back, and his hands drop away to his sides.

“We should probably…” I gesture vaguely to where the others are still sitting.

“Right.” His voice is a little husky. He clears his throat. “Lead the way.”

And I swear I hear a slow exhale behind me, as he follows me back to the table.

Chapter

15

I’m too buzzed after karaoke to sleep well. I tell myself it’s the adrenaline from the performance, and the emotional rollercoaster that came with it. It’s definitely not the fact that I keep seeing the way Leo looked at me after I hugged him whenever I close my eyes.

I open the next challenge in the morning in an attempt to stop replaying that moment.